Constructive Criticism (Your Best Friend)

Criticism... is such a dirty word. Or is it honesty? Billy Joel? Where's my glasses?
Constructive Criticism is something all writers ask for, receive, then bitch about when they get it. HA! You know it's true. (I'm just kidding around, relax.)
Like most writers, I had to learn to not only take criticism, but to harness it in a way to make me a better writer... and person.  I had a writing partner for years, so learning to take constructive criticism, and just criticism in general, was a must to survive. Yes, we argued. Yes, we often disagreed. But... more often than not, our opinions and arguments would spark an idea and make the writing even better.   Every writer knows three truths:  1. Everybody has an opinion 2. Your mom telling you your writing is 'great' isn't helping you in any way.  3. Often... the truth hurts.  I know, nobody wants to hear that their main character is too boring, or that their idea isn't well developed, or that their story is too long or short, or that their story needs to be reworked because, "I can't understand what's going on."   BUT, guess what... it's probably true, especially if you hear it from more than one person. Now, there's only two things you can do about it: You can pout, and tell yourself, "They don't understand what you're trying to do."  Then, when you're done pouting... you fix it.     Here's the dirty little secret: The things 'they' often point out, are almost always things YOU ALREADY KNOW NEED WORK!   When I was writing 'A SPACE STORY' I was lucky enough to have a solid crew around me. A group of friends willing to give me constructive criticism: My writing partner, a friend I have written many a script with, and another friend who has been published multiple times in his life. I would ask them to read my draft, then beg them, then threaten them, then eventually they would read it. After a few months, and some more begging, we would get together and discuss what worked, what didn't work, what made no sense at all, and what I was thinking trying to write a book.  And here's how it went... 9 of the 10 things were things I KNEW needed work. Most criticisms were about chapters that even I hated to read, chapters I hoped to bury and maybe go back to tweak later.  Yes... when they said it, it burned me up inside. But I wasn't mad at them, I just knew they were right! And if it wasn't for them being honest in their criticism, my story would suffer.    I hated having to go back and change things in my story. I HATED IT! But I wrote down all their opinions, changed the things I knew needed work, pondered the things I was on the fence about, and came up with some fresh ideas from opinions I totally didn't agree with. It was hard to fix everything, I had done so much work and spent so much time to get to that point. I wanted my friends to be like my mom and just tell me it's the greatest thing they ever read, and how they just KNEW it was going to become the next Harry Potter! (refer to number 3 for a reality check)   But they didn't. Instead, they said, "Here's what you have to do, in order for you to even get a few people to read this drivel." (Okay, it wasn't that bad, but it felt like it at the time.)  But, in the end, it made the story so much better.   Understand this : The people criticizing your story are your audience. You are writing a story to entertain your audience. If your audience isn't entertained, then you need to fix your story. (If you aren't writing your story to entertain... then skip this part.)  Constructive Criticism is a WIN-WIN!   I LOVE criticism. Any kind will do. Even telling me "You suck, Tig!" is a sort of motivator. Well, maybe not... but you get the point.  We are better writers because of those who are brave enough to tell their honest opinion. You can't thank them enough.  And to you I say:"Seek out those who are critical of your work, for you may not agree with all they say, but you may find truth in their words."(this is best said in a Patrick Stewart'ish type accent)   Now go fix that horrible chapter you hated since you wrote it. And if you need help, I'll gladly tell you it sucks, so you will get mad at me, and then fix it. :)