The Fiver | The Apparition and his nine mortal team-mates

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A Dickensian scene last night at Anfield, as The Apparition Formerly Known As Steven Gerrard belted a free-kick into the top-left corner of the net. The pearler proved a ghostly reminder of Christmas past, when the real Steven Gerrard hoyed one into the same goal against Olympiakos, and Liverpool went on to win Big Cup. But this time it was all for naught, as Basel/Basle/Baaarrrrlll held on for the draw that knocked The Apparition and his nine mortal team-mates out of the same competition. Now the redmen face a blue Christmas, outside in the snow, noses pressed up against the window looking in, as everyone else stands by the roaring fire ripping turkey flesh from the bone and snorkeling mulled wine like there’s no tomorrow. Which there isn’t for Liverpool, not in Big Cup anyway.

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