Guest Aria Glazki: Are You a "Real" Writer

I find these rules quite interesting ...

Today we welcome another one of Mel's fellow Swoon Romance authors with some guidance on whether or not any of us can actually consider ourselves "real" writers. Take a look and leave a comment to let us know if she missed any critical guidelines and how you managed to stack up. I'm curious to see just how many of our author friends are really writers ;)

I only managed to meet one of the criteria. I'll let you all guess which one while I go dig a Diet Sunkist out of the fridge. 

Are You a "Real" Writer?



There is no shortage of posts and articles out there explaining what it takes to be able to call yourself a “real” writer. Some have simply outdated guidelines, like that you must have an agent and a traditional book deal, plus an advanced degree of course. Others include absurd requirements, such as creating weirdly codependent relationships with famous authors, entirely in your own head; desperately wanting a typewriter; or huffing the scent of books (rather than, oh I don’t know, reading them?).



But many “rules” are quite pervasive, appearing countless times, so let’s take a look, shall we? In order to be a “real” writer, you must:



Write Every Day — Because the moment you’ve missed a day, or goodness forbid two, you lose the right to consider yourself a writer. No sick days, no family vacations, no breaks, and no days spent researching rather than writing; if you’re not writing every day, you’re not a writer. But then, if you can go an entire day without a desperate need to write something, which if unfulfilled will make you want to jump off a cliff, you’re obviously not a writer anyway.
Couple quick questions, though, how many days in a row must someone “bank” before this rule comes into effect, transforming him/her into a writer? Is two weeks straight enough? 100 days? A full 365 in a row? And does it matter what you’re writing every day, or does a text message count?


Subsist On Coffee / Caffeine — Here’s a little secret: I don’t drink coffee. I wish I could, in fact, but I’m allergic. I also don’t drink soft drinks, and I’ve recently stopped drinking tea except very rarely (and never for the sake of staying awake). Apparently this means I will never, in fact could never, be a real writer. This strikes me as discrimination of sorts, but the title of “writer” must be kept exclusive somehow, right?




Eat, Sleep, & Breathe Writing, and Prioritize Your Characters Over Real People — You have a life outside of writing? You’re clearly not committed enough. You can participate in social situations, and actually focus on the people you interact with rather than the characters in your head and/or eavesdropping on strangers for snippets of inspiration? Clearly you’re not (meant to be) a writer, because real life must absolutely take a back seat to your need to scribble on every surface while borrowing quirks to give your characters, or planning plot points to write next.
Some people take this all the way to prioritizing writing over healthy eating, sleeping, or basic hygiene. Because health problems are inspiration, and body odor will just help keep all those pesky people who distract you away.


Pay Some (Undefined) Percentage of Your Bills Through Income from Writing — Money makes the world go round. By this logic someone who goes running regularly, participates in marathons, etc. can’t call him/herself a “runner” unless s/he gets paid; someone performing in countless unpaid productions can’t call him/herself an actor. Who decides the cutoff here, though? I mean, if you’re paid enough for one cup of coffee per year, is that satisfactory? Or does it have to be enough to fund that addiction to coffee a writer must absolutely cultivate?




Always Carry a Notebook / Writing Implement — This does make all that unplanned scribbling more convenient. It also saves you from digging through your garbage, like that old napkin or the bag from your popcorn, before knowing it’s safe to throw it away — lest it be the home of your latest great idea. I actually think having a notebook and pen/pencil with you is wise, overall, but how many times can you leave the house without those before you’re disqualified from being a writer?




Hoard Books — Not read them, no. Own them, and own many more than you have actually read. Borrow your books from friends or the library? Not a true writer. Why? Well because you must be able to leave your mark on the page (you’re a writer, aren’t you?), with highlighters and margin notes! And if you want to leave your books clean from scribbles, you will never be a writer.




So many more rules are constantly spouted, but how do you measure up so far? I fail every single one above, so I’m definitely not a real writer. I have a novel releasing today (come celebrate with me at my virtual party!), but that obviously means nothing in the face of this popular wisdom distinguishing between “real” writers, and those who are merely posturing — like me.



Sarcasm aside, no one really knows (or perhaps everyone believes s/he knows) at what point someone truly falls into this special category of “writer.” In some ways, “writer” is a false distinction anyway, as many people actually mean “professional writer,” “author,” or “successful writer,” and variations thereof.



If you’re looking for hard-and-fast rules, I say go do something more easily delineated, like becoming a lawyer or engineer. Otherwise, maybe we should be focusing on being writers, rather than calling ourselves ones. Or go get that MFA in Creative Writing, because earning that sheet of paper will definitely make you a writer.







Aria Glazki is a romance author, and possibly also a writer. Her writing story started when her seventh-grade English teacher encouraged her to submit a class assignment for publication. That piece was printed, and let's just say, she was hooked!



Since then, Aria has run a literary magazine, earned her degree in Creative Writing (as well as in French and Russian literatures), and been published in a few collections. Her novel Mending Heartstrings released today from Swoon Romance. Though her first kiss technically came from a bear cub, and no fairytale transformation followed, Aria still believes magic can happen when the right people come together - if they don't get in their own way, that is.



Other than all things literary, Aria loves spending time with her family, including her two unbearably adorable nieces. She also dabbles in painting, dancing, playing violin, and, given the opportunity, Epicureanism.

Kane’s a country singer who’s tangled with too many deceitful women. He’s learned his lesson: girls are for flirting and fun; emotions are for his music. But after spending a night with an earnest woman unlike any he’s known, he can’t force her out of his mind. So he goes in search of the woman he knows only as “Elle.”

On her last night in Nashville, the staunchly pragmatic Sabella found herself in a situation more suited to a romance novel than reality. Swept away, she ignored her rigidly self-imposed rules, succumbing to the fantasy just this once. But she knows real-world relationships have nothing in common with their fictionalized portrayals. When Kane unexpectedly shows up at her Portland apartment, she must choose between the practical truths she has learned and the desire for a passionate love she has struggled to suppress.

Despite the distance, Kane’s tour schedule, and their meddling friends, both are drawn to the chance for a romance neither quite believes is possible.

Find MENDING HEARTSTRINGS on Goodreads.

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