The Fiver | Offending the best part of two billion people in one fell swoop | Scott Murray

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Anyone who remembers the glory days of the northern soul scene in the 1970s will know that Wigan has long been a hotbed of multiculturalism. The Fiver has failed to find out if local replica-shirt price-fixing magnate Dave Whelan ever went down the Casino in Oxford bags and brogues, clutching a tub of talcum powder, a dip in his hip and a glide in his stride, with the express intention of performing a few spins, backflips and smooth shuffles to a few rare R&B platters. But we’re guessing not. He did break his leg in the 1960 FA Cup final, after all, and those high kicks don’t perform themselves. Perhaps he put his feet up and stayed at home instead, watching whatever was on television back then, stuff like the Black and White Minstrel Show, or Mind Your Language, or the Black and White Minstrel Show. But like we say, the Fiver’s failed to find out any of that.

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