The Fiver | Shortbread McFiver’s take on the 112th meeting of Scotland and England | Scott Murray

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Hats off to Scotland! Their decision to throw last night’s big game – there can be no other explanation for the number of times their midfielders, professional players who make a living from the sport, gave the ball away needlessly while wandering around as though ripped to the nipples on Rohypnol – is almost certain to pay huge dividends! For England left Celtic Park with chests puffed out, confidence high and dander up, having comprehensively stuffed the auld enemy. And given that a 100% qualifying record for Euro 2016 is far from a pipe dream, in a group containing San Marino, Basingstoke Town and a Last of the Summer Wine surviving cast members XI, that old hubristic anglo-confidence surely won’t be long in flooding back. Could this England side become European champions in two years time? Scotland would like to think England would like to think that, because we all know what happens when England think that. Guaranteed fun for Scottish fans during a major championship, whether their team makes it or not, that’s what! Tee hee, right into Scotland’s trap!

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