One time shortly after I moved in I found a pair of women’s panties under the dresser.I was like,...

One time shortly after I moved in I found a pair of women’s panties under the dresser.

I was like, “Whose panties are those?”

And Scott replied, “Oh you know, just some bitch’s.”

And I got mad.

But it turned out that they were Scott’s good luck panties that he wears when he’s writing sometimes. It turns out they were the pair he wore when I went to see him in Philadelphia, the ones that he snapped the sides of in front of me and Matthew Savoca to weird us out.

With anyone else I might think this was a really creative face-saving lie. But no, I married the kind of man who owns a pair of good luck writing panties.

Still ranks pretty high up there on the list of Dumbest Things Scott’s Ever Said tho