Wishing You Well On The Highway To Hell!

The frog just had to belt out another tune. I guess he crossed the border to the land of this loon. He didn't seem to like it very much. I guess those loonies are weird to the touch. Maybe he needs a better ride. I'm sure that cold shrank his umm pride.


I've boarded the highway,
The highway to hell.
The border is lost,
I'm under a spell.

They took my gun,
no right to bear arms.
Those bright red mounties
Must make great fire alarms.

I had to steal monopoly,
Because my money is no good.
These bill colors are so bright,
They can't be misunderstood.

I'm on the highway,
The highway to hell.
Where is the border,
This place has a weird smell.

Maple syrup is on everything.
From chocolate to toast.
Out in the mountains of snow,
There is even a maple syrup weenie roast.

Give me my Canadian bacon,
Wait! There is none of that here.
Could Americans have invented that?
Get me out of this hemisphere.

I'm on the highway
The highway to hell.
Where is the border,
Is this some kind of wishing well?

It asks for a loonie,
Do I have to go insane?
What, now a toonie?
How do I get out of this lane.

What does that sign say?
The damn thing is in french.
When did I leave Canada,
And end up in a France trench?

I'm on the highway,
The highway to hell.
Where is the border,
Is that wearing a bell?

A man riding a moose.
That is sure a first.
And now comes a polar bear,
Quenching its thirst.

Some sort of civilization, at last.
Wait! I call a retraction on that.
They are throwing rocks at rocks,
And sweeping ice like some dingbat.

I'm on the highway,
The highway to hell.
Where is the border,
What's that they sell?

Get my very own igloo,
Two for the price of one?
Free tickets to hockey,
Is life on ice that fun?

Beer cooled in the snow,
A sight on every lawn.
Where is my gun?
I'll shoot myself, if not out of here before dawn.

I'm on the highway,
The highway to hell.
There is the border,
I've taken my last friendly farewell.

I'm off the highway,
The highway to hell.
I have my gun back,
And Eh, I survived hell.

There is yet another tune at my sand dune. Just popped in the other day so gave it a go in the usual smart ass way. Ever been on such a highway to hell? Maybe tickets to moose rides I should sell? It would sure save on gas and make some money for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.