You Have Forfeited The Human Race

There are days I believe we're going to make it as a species. When I think maybe — just maybe — we can resist the parts of ourselves that are shallow and vicious and hideous.

And then the Internet serves up this headline:

"Photos Reveal Abused Toddler Duct-Taped To Wall By Mom."

The story is about Jayla Hamm, a mother who thought it would be funny to tape her child to the wall with the help of her boyfriend:

High on drugs, Hamm held the boy in place while Corde taped his body to the wall of their Beatrice, Neb., home using bright-green duct tape, authorities said.

In some of the photographs, the boy, dressed in a red onesie, is seen hunched over, unable to escape, his wrists firmly taped to the wall behind his back and above his shoulders.

One photograph shows a smiling Hamm posing with her son, whose fingers have been wrapped in a thick shell of tape. In another, the boy's sippy cup is taped to a wall just beyond his reach, and he's crying as he struggles to grab the cup.

The happy ending to this story? Ms. Hamm gets to retain custody of her son.

You'd think that would be the worst humanity has to offer on any given day. Nope.

The family of a 7-year-old Trenton, Mich. girl who is battling a terminal illness has had to take on a very different battle: taunts about the child's condition from their neighbors.

Kathleen Edward is in the late stages of Huntington's disease, a genetic degenerative brain disorder, according to media reports. Her mother, Laura Edward, died of Huntington's last year.

Because of what the Edward family said was a longstanding feud with their neighbors, Jennifer and Scott Petkov, Jennifer Petkov posted images on Facebook of Laura in the arms of the Grim Reaper and Kathleen above a set of crossbones. Neighbors also say the Petkovs built a coffin, put it on their truck and drove past the Edward home, honking the horn.

When asked by a reporter from Detroit television station WJBK why she posted the photos, Jennifer Petkov said it was for "personal satisfaction" and because it upset the child's grandmother.

Seriously, you have to see the defiance and pride on Ms. Petkov's face when she talks about this:

Now that it looks like there might be some consequences for being moral fungus, the Petkovs have apologized.

"My husband is a good person and I hope he doesn't lose his job. I hope our family doesn't lose his job. I'm the bad person," Jennifer Petkov said Friday. "I feel horrible for what I've said and done. That little girl shouldn't have had to lose her mom like that and she shouldn't have to lose her life either. I just hope she didn't see those pictures."

However sincere Ms. Petkov is, I can't help thinking one way to make sure the little girl didn't see the pictures would be not to make or post them in the first place.

Back in college, despite my best efforts to remain in a tequila-infused coma, I learned about "guilt-based" cultures vs. "shame-based" cultures. According to this idea, a culture parcels out disapproval either by making you feel bad about what you've done — guilt — or by having other people look down on you for what you've done — shame. The U.S., due to its heavy Puritan base with its light topping of Freudian theory, is a guilt-based culture. People here are conditioned by societal and cultural norms to feel bad about the things they've done that fall outside the boundaries of acceptable behavior. This is an internal check on what's considered, by the culture, to be wrong. Japan, on the other hand, is a shame-based culture. People there are conditioned to feel bad when they are caught doing something bad — the disapproval comes from the larger society, not from within.

It occurred to me that America, with its large, mobile population, requires a guilt-based culture to enforce cultural norms. Shame is hard to load onto people who, for large chunks of our history, have lived in relatively isolated areas, and who change locations repeatedly, leaving old transgressions — and the people who remember them — in the last town.

But over the past few decades, guilt has lost a great deal of power as a motivator in the U.S. People just don't feel as bad about themselves as they used to. Case in point: there was probably a time in American history when someone who dressed as a member of the Nazi SS would try to hide that fact, rather than pose for photos. Likewise, someone under indictment for stealing government funds would probably not have the brass balls to ask for his severance pay. Or another politician using a federal indictment as a springboard to reality TV.

The word for this is shameless, because people like this literally cannot be shamed. It takes a culture that agrees on what is unacceptable behavior. We don't have that near-universal consensus in our society. Hell, there are even people who will stand up and applaud a child molester.

It takes a substantial effort to draw condemnation in a country as fractured as ours. But at least now we know where people are willing to draw the line. This is how far off the charts you have to go to draw public shame these days.

So congratulations, Ms. Petkov and Ms. Hamm. You have forfeited the human race.