How Doing What Scared Me Changed My Life
Photo credit: Sarah Ann Loreth What scares you?
I'm not talking about snakes, or natural disasters, or thieves breaking into your home (because you should rightfully be afraid of all three).
What I'm referring to are the things that scare you because they represent the UNKNOWN.
-Moving to a new city where you don't know anyone.
-Going to a "singles" meet-up group in the area by yourself.
-Ending a relationship with someone who's been in your life for years.
-Quitting your job to pursue a completely different career, one that you still know very little about.
-Going on a first date.
-Loving someone and letting them see all the parts of you, even the unattractive ones.
-Writing a book you're not sure isn't complete and utter crap, and trying to SELL IT.
-Traveling to a foreign country.....and many many more.
I'm sure you've been faced with one or more of these opportunities, and (as you very well know), I am in the throes of numerous ones as we speak. I am newly-single, UNEMPLOYED, and beginning an entirely new career than what I went to school for. I am poorer than I've been in my entire life. Every day is like slogging through the utter unknown--not sure how I'll pay my bills next month, or how I'll publish this book, or how I'll ever meet my future husband. But guess what? I'm also HAPPIER than I've been in my entire life.
This is my personal account of why you should do what scares you.
I am not trying to brag, nor to be self-righteous. What I AM trying to do is encourage you; to remind you that we live ONE life. We have ONE chance. Why spend it working at a job we don't like, dating someone who doesn't fulfill us, and pushing aside dreams because we don't think we're talented enough to make them happen? That's what I was doing until three months ago when things I never anticipated happened--and my life has literally done a complete 180 since then.
But Ashley. I have bills to pay. SO DO I.
But Ashley. I love my boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/polyamorous lovers, even if they don't make me happy anymore or we live together and they contribute financially, etc. SO DID I.
But Ashley. I have never written a book before. NEITHER HAVE I.
But Ashley. I don't know whether I actually DO want to be a writer/paraglider/ventriloquist/doctor/professional LARPer: NEITHER DID I UNTIL I STARTED DOING IT.
But Ashley. I'm too tired to write a book. SO WAS I UNTIL I QUIT MY SOUL-SUCKING JOB.
Since quitting, my car has broken down and needed to be replaced, my computer broke and needed to be released, I ended a two year relationship, and I found and subsequently lost a roommate to help me pay the bills. I am 25 and have no fucking idea what my life's path will be now. But what I do know is that IT WILL ALL BE OKAY, BECAUSE EVERYTHING HAS WORKED OUT SO FAR. Because I have found my passion, and I truly don't think that something that makes me this happy is not meant to be my career.
I have also written an entire book, and plan on publishing it for the world to see and judge in less than three months. My life is full of the UNKNOWN, but I am choosing to look at it as OPPORTUNITY.
If you dream of doing something, YOU SHOULD DO IT. Save your money, get a passport, go on a date, travel, eat, have sex (safely), love someone, lose someone, write a damn book. It IS POSSIBLE. I am the ultimate example of a careful, frugal girl who has worked and saved money since I was ten years old. It has been extremely uncomfortable to watch my bank account dwindle, to wake up every day not having a "job" to go to, and to remind myself to remain disciplined in writing when I'm feeling dejected and discouraged. But it has been AMAZING. God has shown me my path. And He wants to show you yours, too. So listen to it! Stop ignoring it! Take that chance! God, or fate, or the law of consciousness, or whatever the hell you believe in WILL CATCH YOU. Wouldn't it be so much better to try and fail than to never try at all? You can do it. You can be anything. Make your life something that you are fucking proud of. Tell me your dreams in the comments so we can encourage each other!
AND as promised---here are the sordid details of my first AND WORST kiss ever. Thank you to everyone who subscribed to my newsletter, and if you haven't yet, feel free to!
Until next time, keep writing and KEEP DREAMING.
I'm not talking about snakes, or natural disasters, or thieves breaking into your home (because you should rightfully be afraid of all three).
What I'm referring to are the things that scare you because they represent the UNKNOWN.
-Moving to a new city where you don't know anyone.
-Going to a "singles" meet-up group in the area by yourself.
-Ending a relationship with someone who's been in your life for years.
-Quitting your job to pursue a completely different career, one that you still know very little about.
-Going on a first date.
-Loving someone and letting them see all the parts of you, even the unattractive ones.
-Writing a book you're not sure isn't complete and utter crap, and trying to SELL IT.
-Traveling to a foreign country.....and many many more.
I'm sure you've been faced with one or more of these opportunities, and (as you very well know), I am in the throes of numerous ones as we speak. I am newly-single, UNEMPLOYED, and beginning an entirely new career than what I went to school for. I am poorer than I've been in my entire life. Every day is like slogging through the utter unknown--not sure how I'll pay my bills next month, or how I'll publish this book, or how I'll ever meet my future husband. But guess what? I'm also HAPPIER than I've been in my entire life.
This is my personal account of why you should do what scares you.
I am not trying to brag, nor to be self-righteous. What I AM trying to do is encourage you; to remind you that we live ONE life. We have ONE chance. Why spend it working at a job we don't like, dating someone who doesn't fulfill us, and pushing aside dreams because we don't think we're talented enough to make them happen? That's what I was doing until three months ago when things I never anticipated happened--and my life has literally done a complete 180 since then.
But Ashley. I have bills to pay. SO DO I.
But Ashley. I love my boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/polyamorous lovers, even if they don't make me happy anymore or we live together and they contribute financially, etc. SO DID I.
But Ashley. I have never written a book before. NEITHER HAVE I.
But Ashley. I don't know whether I actually DO want to be a writer/paraglider/ventriloquist/doctor/professional LARPer: NEITHER DID I UNTIL I STARTED DOING IT.
But Ashley. I'm too tired to write a book. SO WAS I UNTIL I QUIT MY SOUL-SUCKING JOB.
Since quitting, my car has broken down and needed to be replaced, my computer broke and needed to be released, I ended a two year relationship, and I found and subsequently lost a roommate to help me pay the bills. I am 25 and have no fucking idea what my life's path will be now. But what I do know is that IT WILL ALL BE OKAY, BECAUSE EVERYTHING HAS WORKED OUT SO FAR. Because I have found my passion, and I truly don't think that something that makes me this happy is not meant to be my career.
I have also written an entire book, and plan on publishing it for the world to see and judge in less than three months. My life is full of the UNKNOWN, but I am choosing to look at it as OPPORTUNITY.
If you dream of doing something, YOU SHOULD DO IT. Save your money, get a passport, go on a date, travel, eat, have sex (safely), love someone, lose someone, write a damn book. It IS POSSIBLE. I am the ultimate example of a careful, frugal girl who has worked and saved money since I was ten years old. It has been extremely uncomfortable to watch my bank account dwindle, to wake up every day not having a "job" to go to, and to remind myself to remain disciplined in writing when I'm feeling dejected and discouraged. But it has been AMAZING. God has shown me my path. And He wants to show you yours, too. So listen to it! Stop ignoring it! Take that chance! God, or fate, or the law of consciousness, or whatever the hell you believe in WILL CATCH YOU. Wouldn't it be so much better to try and fail than to never try at all? You can do it. You can be anything. Make your life something that you are fucking proud of. Tell me your dreams in the comments so we can encourage each other!
AND as promised---here are the sordid details of my first AND WORST kiss ever. Thank you to everyone who subscribed to my newsletter, and if you haven't yet, feel free to!
Until next time, keep writing and KEEP DREAMING.
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