I Remember...

I remember well when Ancient Words was just a good idea. I remember when God pressed it on my heart, in the strongest way, to stop the story I had been playing around with and begin writing this one. I remember the fear, anxiety, and doubts that clouded my every thought. I also remember surrendering to His will.

I remember the countless hours of research. The hundreds of post-it notes piled high on my desk as I typed out my notes. I remember the stress of needing an answer and not finding one right away. I remember the joy and gratitude that came when God answered the simple prayer, "Help me!"

I remember the early writing and the constant doubting. I remember finding my enjoyment in the story, but questioning whether it was a love that only a "mother" could have. I remember getting my first review and the tears of joy that flowed down my face as I learned that someone else loved my precious story too.

I remember the hardships of the editing phase. The pressure of a deadline that stole away my nights. I remember the joy of watching something that had lived only on the computer screen suddenly come to life through the printer. I remember the joys of seeing the pencil marks of an editor as I reached out and claimed my baby, excited to take it to the next level.

I remember the endless hours I spent on the lopsided chair in order to format my creation. I remember how the tears of frustration gave way to tears of joy as one by one those walls crumbled and I became victorious. I remember those that stood with me during those dark hours. Those that spoke a word of prayer or peace. Who wiped my brow and brought my tea and reminded me that something greater was at stake.

I remember that in surrendering my will to His, that I would never walk alone. Even when troubles arose and I couldn't find my way out, His perfect plan would see me through. I remember that whether writing, baking, talking, or washing my life would be to honor Him, and Him only. I remember that striving for perfection and high sales would be a goal too high. A goal too dangerous. A goal not worthy of my time. I remember that seeking to glorify His name in everything would be the only obtainable goal. The only goal blessed by my Father and left within reach.

I sit back today to remember all that I've done and in remembering, I celebrate. Today, the simple story known as Ancient Words has grown into a four book series. Today, the first book is released to the world. Today, Where Can I Flee will live in the hearts of readers instead of my computer screen. Today, I lay down my every effort and my every word at the feet of Jesus and ask only that He use to glorify His holy name.

Today, I look forward to dusting off the scraps of book two. Ready to finish the story that burns within me. Today, I pray for God's continual strength as I understand that Satan's attack will soon take on the form of bad reviews. Today, as with everyday, I celebrate. Thank You, Lord.