Dear Sparkle: Why Did Our Human Move Our Chair?

Dear Sparkle,

Like you, we have an office in our home, and it used to have this really awesome comfy chair! It was in just the right place to catch the morning sun puddles, and near enough to the air conditioning so we were cool but the air wasn’t blowing directly on us. It was a really nice place to watch Bird TV and hang out. But then our human did the unspeakable! She moved the chair into the dark, dreary living room! And she put it in a corner where we can’t see Bird TV all that well, and it doesn’t get any sun puddles. It just feels different and yukky. Humans sit in it all the time, but neither of us will go near it because, bleagh, who wants to? Why did my human move it, and can we get her to move it back?

Signed,

Two Annoyed Kitties

Dear Annoyed Kitties,

Here is proof that humans are utterly clueless when it comes to furniture placement. It sounds to me like your chair was in the perfect spot before it was moved. But of course, humans, being humans, can’t leave well enough alone. They always want to “rearrange” things, never realizing that where they put them in the first place was probably exactly where they needed to be. We cats trust our instincts and they are almost always right. Because humans second-guess themselves, they are almost always wrong. And when humans aren’t second guessing themselves, they decide to move furniture around just because they are “bored,” or they think they want a change. In other words, they do things randomly for no reason — and the result is, we kitties get our lives disrupted.

I can’t imagine how your human can believe that your comfy chair is in a better spot because clearly it isn’t. Since humans are such willful creatures, and stubborn besides, I don’t know if you’ll be able to get her to move the chair back. But if you both repeatedly go into the office, sit in the spot where the chair used to be and glare accusingly at your human, maybe she will get the idea that she shouldn’t have moved your chair. At the very least, it might make her nervous, which counts as partial punishment for her misdeed.
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!