Please fire me. I have a bachelors degree and I can read, write, and speak 4 languages, and I work...

Please fire me. I have a bachelors degree and I can read, write, and speak 4 languages, and I work at a public library. Today I found porn in the men’s room used up until it was destroyed, checked out a million DVD’s to a very pregnant crackhead, and tired to help a woman locate her daughter who is currently in prison for forgery and operating a meth lab - all before 11 am.