I Have A Better Pledge Suggestion

If I may, I have a better pledge suggestion for the House Republicans. And to keep them happy, they can even make this pledge without mentioning earmarks.

Here goes:

We, the House Republicans, pledge to do only these things and limit ourselves to doing them in such a way that if normal, non-lawyer Americans cannot comprehend our actions as deriving from one of these then we shall deem the action beyond the scope of our powers and not do it. The things we shall do and only do are as follows: