Full Circle

I have a story in my head about my day, but the story and how it unfolds on this page will take a few turns before it becomes apparent as to where it’s headed, or what its about. That’s how I usually roll, and I apologize in advance. As a writer, my mind is on overdrive at all times. Similar to writing a book, writing a post usually takes some turns before I come to the point of my story. And in writing, as in life – most things tend to unfold that way.

I will start by giving you a recap of the past few days in my currently crazy life. Saturday I spent all day packing my life into boxes. I have been too busy to begin packing in stages over a week or two like normal people so I scheduled packing my entire house for Saturday. It was a long day. Sunday I spent the day moving the packed boxes, and furniture, and plants, and, and, and. Thanks to the guys in my life and a large truck – we got it done in one trip. Sunday evening after the large truck was unloaded, and my life moved into a two-car garage, we loaded up the family and met my dad and brother for dinner. They were in town for only two days, and it was important to me to see them. Monday came, and I had a cleaning assistant scheduled for eight in the morning and after I got her settled in there were many errands to run. My man and I went out into town to buy primer and paint, patch kits for the walls, shelving systems and groceries. Then the real work began – I unpacked the kitchen and cleaned along the way while the guys attempted to cover a rather colorful wall with primer. We hauled boxes into the new house and organized closets and I had a place to set my computer and writing necessities. The night ended at three in the morning for me, and the next day began at five-thirty, and that brings us to Tuesday. I woke up cranky, tired and sore. I felt hung over from lack of sleep, and I hate that feeling. Tuesday morning brought new challenges; my new cleaning assistant had to come back because the job was too large to finish on Monday – so she arrived at eight. The carpet guys showed up at nine-thirty. All primer and painting was put on hold. And, all those boxes we brought in – well, they had to be hauled back to the garage. It was already hot by nine in the morning, and we had to leave the windows open and kill the air conditioning for the carpets to dry. It was miserable, and we were all tired and as I looked around I realized how much I still had to do. A LOT. The re-arranging and unpacking of the upstairs hadn’t even started yet. In my mind, I had a plan laid out. The to-do list was ready to be checked off, and I felt it was doable. I thought by Wednesday everything would be cleaned, unpacked and in order and I could get back to writing. Did I mention that I have four books to write, have edited and publish by February 2015?

Life happens, and our plans don’t always turn out the way we want them to or the way we plan them. When that happens, we have a choice. We can have a suck-ass attitude and get frustrated and crabby, or we can put a smile on, take one room at a time and be thankful to have the (small) problems that we have. That Tuesday when I woke up I made my choice – I chose to be a bitch with a crappy attitude. I allowed my mind and body to succumb to stress, and I got little accomplished that morning. I also had a scheduled meeting that day and needed to leave the house by noon. And although I was excited about that appointment, I was also beyond stressed at the thought of having to walk away from the disaster that I called home to attend any engagement. And, I felt that way on the whole drive down to Freedom Station. Then, as it often happens in these situations – I was there, in the middle of that appointment and all the stress melted away, I felt a smile on my face go from forced to genuine and I moved from a place of “poor me” to a place of gratitude, which brings me to why I decided to write this post.

I parked my SUV down the street from Freedom Station and rushed up the small hill to 28th Street. I could see Mugs and Fingers standing outside of the gate in front of the facility, and I watched Fingers pull out his cell phone and began to run a bit faster. He was calling me. As I neared the two Vietnam Veterans, the gate opened, and I caught up just as the gate began to close. Hugs were shared, and smiles were big and that energy you feel when you are on the inside of Freedom Station enveloped all three of us. I was excited, and they were excited and boxes, cleaning and everything else left my mind. I was in the presence of greatness. Men who did things and survived struggles that make mine look like a broken nail in comparison – were my guests at a place where current Warriors lived and learned how to cope with their struggles. The fact that I have a unique opportunity to know these men, let alone get to interview and write about them is not lost on me.

We entered the office at Freedom Station and were met by Sandy Lehmkuhler. If you haven’t read my past posts about Warrior Foundation~Freedom Station and Sandy – well, you should. Sandy is an amazing woman and a Warrior in her own right. She does the work of ten people every single day. Her passion for the Warriors that Freedom Station serves is evident the second you meet her, and I have never met a more dedicated individual. Sandy told Mugs and Fingers about Freedom Station and shared several stories of the Warriors. About how they have rehabilitated and how many of them have not only gone to live productive, positive lives but have gone on to do amazing things and help others in the same situation. And, by situation I mean – the loss of a limb or limbs, suffering from PTS and TBI and grief over the loss of fellow brothers. I sat and listened to Mugs and Fingers share their own stories. Fingers can understand the plight of the Warriors of Freedom Station because he too came back from the war with a loss, having sacrificed parts of his body. He lost fingers during his time as a POW. He has an amazing story of overcoming. As I stood listening and watching the interaction between Sandy and these two Vietnam Warriors, the concept of full circle came to mind. Full circle on so many levels.

We began a tour of Freedom Station and our first stop was the gym. The gym at Freedom Station is a garage that is equip with a lift for wheelchair access to get the Warriors in chairs from the top step down to the ground floor. Sandy is very proud of that addition. The gym is currently undergoing a transformation. The initial gym equipment that was given to Freedom Station by one of its many amazing donors was great equipment, but there were many Warriors who could not lift plate weights – lifting weights from the floor to the bar is almost impossible when you have a prosthetic. So, Sandy did what she does best. When the Warriors have a need – Sandy does whatever, it takes to make it happen. And with the help of several other donors, the gym is now being furnished with weight training equipment that uses a pulley system instead of stand-alone plate weights. Sandy also has another amazing skill – nothing goes to waste. She attributes this to her 20+ years as a Navy wife and jokingly states that she doesn’t pinch pennies, she makes them bleed. With that said, the original equipment was donated to San Diego Fire Station 11. Full Circle. Gym pieces that were donated to the Warriors is now housed and being used by other heroes – our first responders here in San Diego. The fact that it ended up going to Station 11 is one of those fate – destiny – higher-power type things because Freedom Station houses 11 Warriors. Call it what you want – to Sandy it was supposed to happen that way, and I agree.

Our next stop along the tour of the facility was the garage shop that houses the Warrior’s chopper. Sandy explained to Mugs and Fingers how she saw a need for the Warriors to work together on a project, and they agreed on a build-it-from-boxes motorcycle. Sandy told us about delivery day and looking at several boxes full of parts wondering how in the heck the guys were going to work together to build a motorcycle from boxes of parts. But, they did. In fact, they built a beautiful, museum quality bike that they have been able to take to several events including Sturgis. This Harley is unlike any other out there – the Warriors added to it with items that they know well. The bike has a 50cal, bayonet, claymore mine, Ka-bars and a 60mm all used as parts on the bike. Mugs and Fingers looked like kids in a candy store while in the shop.

Finally, we made our way to the cottage occupied by one of the first Warriors to move into Freedom Station. This is where the full circle concept hit me hardest today. Being able to watch two Veterans from Vietnam who fought their personal battles with the scars left by war, both physical and mental, stand next to and talk with a Warrior just beginning to fight his battle was a breathtaking sight. If you talk individually with these Vietnam era Veterans, they look at the guys fighting now as heroes. If you talk with the Warriors at Freedom Station, they look at the older generation of Warriors from past wars as heroes. Respect, humility and patriotism runs rich with all of these men – no matter what war they fought in or what battle(s) they currently deal with. None of these men considers themselves a hero and are quick to point out others who they feel are more deserving of such a title.

As our time together drew to a close, I realized that I too came full circle that day. My attitude changed to a place of gratitude, and it’s impossible to be in a crap mood when you come from a place of gratitude. I am grateful for everything I have and for the battles I will never have to fight. I am grateful for the opportunity to tell the story of Freedom Station, the Warriors there and the story of two amazing Vietnam era pilots and Warriors. I am grateful that I get to sit and listen to stories that most will never hear first-hand. I am grateful for my new-found friendship with a woman who serves as a true inspiration for me. I am grateful that I have a home to go back to and boxes to unpack and arrange however I wish. And, I am grateful that I know I will sleep through the night tonight and get up tomorrow morning to sit in a chair in my backyard in the land of the free in my little piece of the USA sipping coffee and thinking about how truly blessed I am to have a choice on what attitude I carry throughout the day. May we all have the ability to come full circle.

Thank you to all who have fought and sacrificed for my freedom. May you find peace along your new journey’s. God bless you, and God bless America.

 

-RJ