""You’re too good for me," but not good enough to where you will wake up missing me in the..."

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"You’re too good for me," but not good enough to where you will wake up missing me in the morning and missing me until you are finally in my arms again. "I don’t deserve you," but you deserve more than this, more than what I am able to give you. If you don’t deserve me, and I am too good for you, too good for this kind of love that we have created so far, then why are you letting me go? Why are you putting a wedge of what you deserve and what I can give between us?

I’ve heard this speech one too many times. “You’re too good for me. I don’t deserve you. You can get better.” But I don’t want better. I want you. I want you and me in a house that we can’t afford, a house who’s walls are painted in memories of a past that we set for ourselves. I look at my hands and I can see what our future would have held if you would have just stayed with me instead of giving me away to anyone who is truly worthy of my love. But you are worthy of my love, and you always have been. But you don’t want my love anymore, do you? So that’s why you tell me that I am too good for this, too good for you. That I deserve better, that I deserve more, and you aren’t the more that you are always bringing up.

Instead of telling me what I want to hear, or what you can say that will salvage what is left of this almost forgotten relationship, just tell me that you can live without me, and you can find someone who is worthy of what you have to offer. I don’t want you to sugarcoat the truth anymore. I’m tired of you putting me above what you really want to say, just for the sake of how I might perceive you, and how I might hold this once so hopeful relationship. I am not too good for you. You are not too good for me. I deserve this, I deserve you, and you cannot say what it is that I am able to hold onto.

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- "The I don’t deserve you speech," - Colleen Brown