What Size?
Recently I attempted to order a small soft drink at a fast food chain. “We don’t have small,” the perky young woman at the counter advised me.
Intrigued, I asked, “What sizes of drink do you offer?” The choices were medium or large. I don’t really understand how medium can exist without both small and large for comparison. No doubt we could have had an interesting discussion on the topic. However, rather than pursue this conversation I opted for a medium drink. It turned out to be more expensive but exactly the same number of ounces as the now defunct “small” size.
I can still get a small, medium, or large drink at a trendy coffee shop, provided I learn a foreign language. Beats me how tall can equal small, but that’s nothing compared to the angst of remembering to say “venti” for the largest size. At least I think it’s the largest. I’m pretty sure there’s something roughly equivalent to medium in between tall and venti, but I can’t remember what it is. Be assured there’s no relationship between the word and the concept of size in my mind.
Remember “one size fits all”? I haven’t seen one of those for ages. Now the tag reads, “One size fits most.” I suppose we are no longer expected to have the common sense to know a newborn can’t wear a poncho designed for an average adult female. My Great Aunt Helen probably couldn't cover herself with that garment either, and I’d bet the dimmest bulb among us can figure out why.
Oh, wait, that term “common sense” may be at the core of all this confusion. It seems to be lost in a sea of rhetoric, along with me. Guess it's not a big issue. Excuse me, I suppose I should say non pas venti, no?
-Carlene Havel
-Author of Love Stories http://goo.gl/ugcII
Intrigued, I asked, “What sizes of drink do you offer?” The choices were medium or large. I don’t really understand how medium can exist without both small and large for comparison. No doubt we could have had an interesting discussion on the topic. However, rather than pursue this conversation I opted for a medium drink. It turned out to be more expensive but exactly the same number of ounces as the now defunct “small” size.
I can still get a small, medium, or large drink at a trendy coffee shop, provided I learn a foreign language. Beats me how tall can equal small, but that’s nothing compared to the angst of remembering to say “venti” for the largest size. At least I think it’s the largest. I’m pretty sure there’s something roughly equivalent to medium in between tall and venti, but I can’t remember what it is. Be assured there’s no relationship between the word and the concept of size in my mind.
Remember “one size fits all”? I haven’t seen one of those for ages. Now the tag reads, “One size fits most.” I suppose we are no longer expected to have the common sense to know a newborn can’t wear a poncho designed for an average adult female. My Great Aunt Helen probably couldn't cover herself with that garment either, and I’d bet the dimmest bulb among us can figure out why.
Oh, wait, that term “common sense” may be at the core of all this confusion. It seems to be lost in a sea of rhetoric, along with me. Guess it's not a big issue. Excuse me, I suppose I should say non pas venti, no?
-Carlene Havel
-Author of Love Stories http://goo.gl/ugcII
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