You’re an AUTHOR??????????????????
Great Mother Isis!
I thought yesterday was weird but today…………… no, I didn’t get into any fist-fights or go to hospital or any of the usual drama, but I got discovered.
Our local fag shop is an old-fashioned affair that sells most things and if there are four of you in there it constitutes a crowd so we regulars get to know each other.
You will have gathered by now that Sir Terry Pratchett is a bit sick of people asking him if he based Nanny Ogg on me because he had never heard of Ailsa Abraham but, to be fair, on getting a description he admits that there are a lot of similarities. I know everyone’s first name, family history, medical conditions and private lives within five minutes – just how I am. Chatty.
So I go into the fag shop and there is a feller signing books. I go over and shake hands as a colleague, having been delighted to find that my third favourite gay friend Daniel is now working there and we have a natter about books. I’m so enchanted that I rush home and find a paperback copy of Alchemy, sign it, grab my Vistaprint card holder and go back.
The shop erupts into an ecstasy of delight. No? You? Elise (my French name)? You’re a writer?? You are published?? Oh my God!!!!!!!!
I don’t think I have been hugged and kissed so much in my life and they broke out the champagne and canapés. Poor Guy who was selling his books took a back seat while their “local author” took centre stage
See – I’d never thought that selling books in English would work. I have now explained that it isn’t Shakespeare or Dickens, it is normal everyday English and would be fabulous for any of their kids who are learning English. I was convinced that nobody would want to know. I was wrong. The fact that they can brandish a book and say – this lady lives in our village counts for a lot.
You also have to remember that in the French psyche “author” is equated with “enormous brain” so you will understand that they couldn’t believe that the woman with funny accent who makes jokes all the time and dismisses a strokes as “bit of bother” ….. is an AUTHOR!
So I will do a book signing there, I’ll have my laptop so people can order online Kindle versions but – I’ll be there, at my table, chatting to everyone, making them laugh and maybe, just maybe, convincing them that English isn’t that difficult.
After punch-ups yesterday I wanted a quiet day – didn’t happen.


Ailsa Abraham
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