On This Bare Earth – Thoughts on Mother’s Day 2014

To all of those for whom Mother’s Day isn’t easy.

I saw a baby bird the other day. It had fallen from its nest, its body contorted on the bare earth. I only ever see that when I have to say goodbye, like some cruel omen, shattering a beautiful day.

The next day, I started spotting, a sign that life is ebbing in the one place life should be blooming.

It’s Mother’s Day in two days

and I need to figure out how to cry it all out by then.

How do I face that I’ve lost again?

That I’m his mother, yes, but only in heaven?

On this bare earth, my motherhood is shattered, broken. My one little girl, birthed by adoption, stares at me funny — “Mama, why are you crying? Again?”

Life, I tell you, life is beautiful, life is amazing, glorious.

Death? Death sucks.

I heard there was a Lamb who gave of Himself, who fought the lies that wage war against us and overcame. I heard there was a Lamb who swallowed up death with life, who sits on a throne. I heard there was a Lamb who carries the only scars in heaven, who in victory still looks as if He’s slain. I heard there was a Lamb, and I long to hold Him close to my heart. Because on a day when there is more pain than comfort, more death than life, more sorrow than joy, I want to be surrounded by the One who is LIFE. I want to be surrounded by life and give life wherever I go.

Life, I tell you, life is beautiful, amazing, glorious.

Death? Death sucks.

At the end of it all, there is hope. There is hope that doesn’t disappoint.