notes from a failed temp job

i have a new stack of words up at the fanzine today about unemployment, artificial intelligence, etc. 

here are the notes i wrote down during training (only days one and two) for the temp job i did not receive. the job involved assessing essays for the georgia writing project, a required essay for all students who hope to graduate high school in the state of georgia:

DAY ONE

9:14 - dude compares grading high school essays to  assessing pilots of 737’s for competency/plane crash risk
9:20 - directions to the break room
9:30 - no coffee for free loaders
9:43 - dude works Breaking Bad final reference into powerpoint presentation
9:44 - I notice a very large plant next to the emergency exit and a picture of Denzel Washington reading Green Eggs and Ham
10:14 - dude shocks himself completely by saying “dude”

—everyone has their name cards faced toward themselves—

2:25 - dude with the last name “Boring” to rows up
2:35 - conference room has Stephen Hawking READ poster with copy of Marilyn Monroe biography in his  wheel chair pocket / space background / disembodied Hawking head floating in space
3:50 - waiting for final conference of the day. I disagree with many of the scorings the state of Georgia has given on practice essays. keep staring at Serena Williams READ poster
3:53 - I keep thinking everyone is in wheelchairs
4:00 - I keep imagining an emergency gatekeeper by EMERGENCY EXIT ONLY sign whose job it is to assess level of emergency before allowing anyone out the door
4:02 - everyone here probably has a pushcart nomination
4:03/4:04 - clocks on either side of the room are out of sync by one minute. perhaps this is to make us imagine a world where time zones are in minute gradients rather than an hour at a time
4:04/4:05 - that was a stupid thought
4:09/4:10 - beginning to distrust the celebrities in the READ posters/view them as lameduck enforcers of the grade school canon circa 2006
4:16 - went to bathroom. imagined myself as a psychic medium encountering a distinct pee-colored aura

DAY TWO

8:50 - LL Cool J is reading the The Children’s Healthy Food Book
9:15 - in my mind, yesterday was a very dark day
11:05 - seems like the plant under Serena Williams moves closer every hour
11:10 - just noticed LL Cool J is wearing a FuBu hat
11:11 - link on FuBu website to FuBu facebook page that says “Face Us, Book Us”
12:25 - why is there a lamp in this room? also, discovered that Southerners don’t have a problem with a kid addressing the reader of a their formal essay as “y’all”
12:27 - should I use this job as an opportunity to prevent bad writers from graduating high school?