Chapter Four
They were forbidden to pray to the Guardians directly. From their earliest days, they had been shown how they were unclean in the sight of the Lord. It was the Host who interceded between their soldiers and God-on-Earth. None of their commanders were in the room, but the squad knew they would listen as each man confessed their sins. Sev broke down while he spoke of his love for Twofer, sobbing in gratitude to the Host for relieving him from Hell. They told each other their shames and their secrets, because they all succumbed to temptations and idleness. They played video games and read books and fucked, but only within the squad, to keep the sin from spreading out. Mike prayed it out, and he and the others reached themselves like plants toward the sun. For the second time that night, Mike felt scoured, cleansed and clean.
The squad broke off their prayer after nearly an hour. Mike wandered from the circle to the shower, and then to his room. He stepped in, tingling numb, and paused in the doorway. Alpha was exercising in their two-room suite, counting jump and clap pushups with harsh rasps of breath. Mike watched him for a count of five, before Alpha spotted him out of his peripheral vision and stopped, mid press, to look up.
“Come on. Now you’re just showing off.” Mike peeled his shirt up over his head and threw it across the room. It smacked the edge of the washing hamper, teetered, and then tumbled in. “We’ve had a full day. Why the hell are you working out?”
“I didn’t puke today. We’ll have to try harder tomorrow.” Alpha pushed himself up, got the balls of his feet underneath him, and bounced up on his toes. He rolled his shoulders back. “You had your shower yet? I want a massage.”
“Yeah.” Mike’s fingers twitched expectantly, but he didn’t move just yet. Part of him wanted to just bask in the sensation of being cleansed from guilt. He didn’t want to lose that polished glow from the prayer so fast, but the rest of him was already mesmerized by the play of light over the muscles of Alpha’s back. He wrestled with his desire in a way Alpha never seemed to. Maybe it was because he was the Medic and Padre, just his own sense of responsibility to set a good example. Maybe it was a PatriotAlpha thing, the lack of shame. While they were technically identical, Mike knew that the Alphas were different somehow, imparted with natures that were harder and colder than the squads they led. He sat down on the bed, and Alpha thudded down in front of him.
“You looked pretty stressed out during chow.” When Mike set to work, he found Alpha’s shoulders deeply knotted, hard as armor plate. He manipulated his muscles with clever hands, working them loose. “Whatever went on between you and his Grace stirred you right up.”
“I don’t know what I think about this.” Alpha’s voice was a little flat, and tired. “I mean, I’m happy. But Twofer’s one of my boys, Mike. I don’t like it when anything fucks with my squad.”
Even God? Mike’s hands slid down the backs of his arms, fingers limp with surprise. He had never believed Alpha capable of saying such a thing. “But-”
“I know. He was Chosen. And I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong. It’s the best thing that can happen.” Alpha blew out a tense breath. “It’s just… real sudden. And Twofer, of all people. He’s such a shit. Remember when he and Niner put the banana spider in Fora’s cockpit?”
Mike snorted. He remembered: Fora swinging into the cockpit, the armor folding up over him, and then a girlish scream and a rapid reversal of the whole process as he bounced out again, flailing at his head and down his front. “Yeah. He nearly pissed himself.”
“Niner and Twofer… Lord help me. I don’t know how he and Sev worked out so well together.” Alpha shook his head, and leaned back against Mike’s chest. They all had the same broad, rough-hewn, strong boned faces, the same dark skin, dark hair, and deep-set eyes, but
Alpha always seemed larger than Mike ever felt. “My corona’s got a feed on all the dorm rooms here, you know. I can look in on any of you. You know what I see when I look in Number Three? Niner dancing around in his fucking underwear, trying to cheer up Sev. What if he just disappeared, too?”
