Mental Illness and what you can do

Talking to a depressed person as if you are talking to a mentally whole person is only going to end with you being frustrated that the depressed person “takes everything the wrong way.” Of course they do. That is the symptom of their problem. It isn’t that they are doing this willfully, however. Don’t imagine that they *want* to remain depressed, though it may seem that no matter how stubbornly you present the “real” facts to them, they won’t listen.

You can talk all day long about how grateful they should be about the good things in their life. And none of those good things will matter to them. They can’t weigh the good and the bad. They can’t feel happy just by thinking about good things. They can’t because they’re depressed and that’s what depression is. It means they can’t just turn a switch like a normal person can who feels a little blue—but isn’t clinically depressed.

When I look back at my experiences as a depressed person and think of the people who said things that hurt me, I am aware at the same time that it is entirely possible I am remembering every single one of those conversations incorrectly. It may be that if there were some objective view of the universe that we could go to, rewind the tape, and see it again, I would be astonished to discover that not only do I have the intent wrong, but all of the words wrong, too. I could have made things up that other people didn’t say simply to fit with my depressed mood.

I don’t think that’s what happened, but that’s another one of the effects of depression, that you end up unable to tell what’s real and what’s not. It’s another reason why people who are depressed tend to stay away from other people, which in some ways deepens the depression because all humans have a basic need for social interaction. We aren’t sure that we are being rational and we don’t want to think that we are causing other people hurt. Even if our brains aren’t working, that doesn’t mean that we’re mean (not usually). We can’t trust ourselves, and so we do this self-protective thing to keep from doing crazy stuff.

You can’t just fix this with a book on how to be happier. You can’t fix it with love (though love certainly doesn’t hurt).

Right now, Robison Wells, a good friend and someone who suffers with multiple mental illnesses needs help right now. We can’t help in many ways, but we can do this one little thing. Please, donate!

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/altered-perceptions#home