The DJ Submits

Remember DJ Tanner on Full House? Well, she’s all grown up. The actress, 38-year old Cameron Bure, is now a wife and a mother of three. I just read that she considers herself a “submissive” wife. That piqued my interest, so I read an article about her in US Weekly and she says, “My husband and I are absolute equals!” Then she follows that up with, “But he is the man and head of our household…When there are major decisions – like where we want to live – we may or may not agree. We talk it out, but if my husband thinks ultimately, Hey, this is the best and wisest thing for our family, I trust that.”

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And, that’s her definition of “absolute equals”? 

Look, far be it from me to be the one who tells couples what makes them happy. If that truly floats their boats, more power to them, but I don’t understand how Bure can claim they are equals while also saying she’s submissive to her husband. Doesn’t the definition of submissive say that she is not equal to her husband? And, what if the place he chooses really isn’t the best and wisest place for the family? What if her choice was better financially and for the kids? Just because he can grow a beard doesn’t mean he should have the final word on real estate.

I know, it worked for many families from prehistoric hunter and gatherer days, up until the 1960′s. Yes, it can work. But, why should it? I mean, many men will willingly accept the role of “master of the house” if their wives drape that title upon them, but will the women be happy in the long run, or will they just feign happiness to make him comfortable?

If you are in a relationship now like Cameron Bure and her husband, and the arrangement is working for you, kudos. And, I mean that without a hint of sarcasm. Again, whatever works for couples works, and I’m all about working. But, if it doesn’t work, and you want a relationship that feels good being a part of, voice your concerns and feelings. Submission does not have a be a part of marriage in the 21st century. Think of what Bob Saget would say (DJ’s dad).