Waiting for permission.
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I recently applied for a job, something a bit different to the jobs I’ve applied for which may have been one class or a chance to start working with a different group - no, this was a job title more than a job. No class went with it, I still had to set up my own classes and get bodies through the door, but going through the process, thinking about it I got quite excited about the potential.
I felt that if someone gave me that job title it meant that I was worthy, that it was a stamp of respect, of quality, and of course the floodgates would open and those warm bodies would flood through the door.
I didn’t get it. And so of course now I am focusing on the downsides, a slightly different reality, but the biggest question in my head is... if I was ready to start teaching a class like that, or even a class of my own making in a similar area, why didn’t I/don’t I just go ahead and do it.
Today I got a great motivational email from Rachel Holmes of Choreography To Go (I get one every day) and her guest writer Jenny Burrell used a phrase that hit the nail on the head for me: “release the need to be anointed by others – anoint yourself, and know that you are anointed, stop waiting for ANYONE TO MAKE YOU!”
It’s exactly that, so many of us are waiting for that anointing, because in truth we don’t need permission. Of course you need a license if you want to teach a licensed programme, or drive a car, but you don’t need a license to get on a bike, write a book, write a blog, design and teach your own class, start your own business.
It’s funny because it takes me back to my filmmaking days - when everyone, writer, director, cameraman is out there trying to get a job, while the tools of the job are sitting in your hands. I remember going out for a drink in Soho with the people working on my ultra low budget feature film and one of the girls brought along a guy she was working with. He said he was working as a runner on a studio film and we got to talking about the differences, and I was, as usual, going on about my film and how exciting it was, albeit wishing for a budget a hundred times more, telling him how he would eventually get his chance. In the end he broke, he wasn’t a runner, he was the director of a multi-million dollar feature shooting with major movie stars for a top studio. Ulp! And all he could talk about was how much he wished he could work with that same passion, choice and not have to deal with egos, politics and accountants, how he wished he had gone out and done it by himself.
There’s safety in numbers, in being part of a bigger venture, in paying your dues and working your way up to head of this, Vice President of that, but you don’t get something for nothing. You can be on a train flying past at thousands of miles, getting where you’re going fast and safely, trusting the guy at the front of the train or even being the guy at the front of the train, or you can be on a push bike.
On a push bike you get to see the scenery slow, you get to stop when you want, you get really strong legs when you pedal uphill... and you also risk being knocked down by a bus.
I suppose my question to myself, having been rejected for a job I thought I wanted is this; do I want to try harder for that same job, or could I take a step back and ask, if I could teach anything I wanted, to who I wanted, however I wanted, what would that look like? What do I want to share, what do other people need, what makes me feel happy and giving and free and brave and scared.
What would I do if I gave myself permission to do anything?
You don’t need a cool job title to have a cool job, but when I made my first business cards for Pearl Escapes I gave myself the title “Explorer-in-Chief”. It still sits proudly on my business cards and so many people have commented on it, that they would love a job like that. I’m so glad I picked me for the job.
x P
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I recently applied for a job, something a bit different to the jobs I’ve applied for which may have been one class or a chance to start working with a different group - no, this was a job title more than a job. No class went with it, I still had to set up my own classes and get bodies through the door, but going through the process, thinking about it I got quite excited about the potential.
I felt that if someone gave me that job title it meant that I was worthy, that it was a stamp of respect, of quality, and of course the floodgates would open and those warm bodies would flood through the door.
I didn’t get it. And so of course now I am focusing on the downsides, a slightly different reality, but the biggest question in my head is... if I was ready to start teaching a class like that, or even a class of my own making in a similar area, why didn’t I/don’t I just go ahead and do it.
Today I got a great motivational email from Rachel Holmes of Choreography To Go (I get one every day) and her guest writer Jenny Burrell used a phrase that hit the nail on the head for me: “release the need to be anointed by others – anoint yourself, and know that you are anointed, stop waiting for ANYONE TO MAKE YOU!”
It’s exactly that, so many of us are waiting for that anointing, because in truth we don’t need permission. Of course you need a license if you want to teach a licensed programme, or drive a car, but you don’t need a license to get on a bike, write a book, write a blog, design and teach your own class, start your own business.
It’s funny because it takes me back to my filmmaking days - when everyone, writer, director, cameraman is out there trying to get a job, while the tools of the job are sitting in your hands. I remember going out for a drink in Soho with the people working on my ultra low budget feature film and one of the girls brought along a guy she was working with. He said he was working as a runner on a studio film and we got to talking about the differences, and I was, as usual, going on about my film and how exciting it was, albeit wishing for a budget a hundred times more, telling him how he would eventually get his chance. In the end he broke, he wasn’t a runner, he was the director of a multi-million dollar feature shooting with major movie stars for a top studio. Ulp! And all he could talk about was how much he wished he could work with that same passion, choice and not have to deal with egos, politics and accountants, how he wished he had gone out and done it by himself.
There’s safety in numbers, in being part of a bigger venture, in paying your dues and working your way up to head of this, Vice President of that, but you don’t get something for nothing. You can be on a train flying past at thousands of miles, getting where you’re going fast and safely, trusting the guy at the front of the train or even being the guy at the front of the train, or you can be on a push bike.
On a push bike you get to see the scenery slow, you get to stop when you want, you get really strong legs when you pedal uphill... and you also risk being knocked down by a bus.
I suppose my question to myself, having been rejected for a job I thought I wanted is this; do I want to try harder for that same job, or could I take a step back and ask, if I could teach anything I wanted, to who I wanted, however I wanted, what would that look like? What do I want to share, what do other people need, what makes me feel happy and giving and free and brave and scared.
What would I do if I gave myself permission to do anything?
You don’t need a cool job title to have a cool job, but when I made my first business cards for Pearl Escapes I gave myself the title “Explorer-in-Chief”. It still sits proudly on my business cards and so many people have commented on it, that they would love a job like that. I’m so glad I picked me for the job.
x P
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