Contest runner-up #1

Some of the entries in my recent "Write my author bio" contest were exceptionally well done but did not really qualify as true author bios in my mind.  But they were ingenious and creative, nonetheless, and could certainly be utilized in other capacities, as part of promotional material for my book tour or blurbs in advertising and on other websites.  They read like ad copy rather than an author bio, and they might just come in handy after all.  

Two of my favorite in this category were...