is it bad that i miss my sadness? i miss how i could control myself from snacking and also i can feel it. i feel like i fake my emotions too much that i believe its real

It’s not sad, but it’s also not good. But I honestly understand how you feel. I used to feel that way. But love, you do have self-control. You just have to learn how to control yourself when happiness is inside of you. Don’t let the sadness swallow you. Don’t let it make you think that you are better with it on your back. That’s what it wants. Don’t feed it. Please. You are much too good, too beautiful for that. Just let the happiness and the warmth get a feel for you for a little while. Give it a chance. It will surprise you.