Goblin pets
Goblins Pets
Goblins are renown for being stupid and crazy, but in the time they have lived near and observed other races, they have picked up some of their habits. Oddly enough, one of these is keeping pets. They avoid traditional choices such as dogs, cats, fish and birds. These animals are too big or too noisy or too demanding, and goblins just plain don’t like cats. But there are other animals that fit a goblin’s liking far more, and these can be an unpleasant surprise to their enemies.
One favorite pet is the skunk. Skunks are capable of producing an incredibly foul odor, but they only do so when scared. The rest of the time they are fairly calm animals, easy to care for and rather affectionate. Goblins that adopt skunks are very careful with their pets, making sure they have plenty of food and water, and keeping them away from danger, loud noises or other forms of stress. Then, at the proper time, the owner will release his pet into a crowded barracks, stores filled with customers, or the ever popular royal coronation. The skunk is sure to cause a panic whether it sprays people or not. Goblins also throw skunks at attackers, where the terrified animal is certain to release its stink.
Goblins also favor snakes as pets. Most people fear snakes, which is odd given that most snakes are neither poisonous nor all that aggressive. Goblins understand this and collect common snakes such as garter, milk and corn snakes, none of which is the least bit dangerous. They store the snakes in baskets near fireplaces to keep the cold-blooded animals warm. When the goblin owner needs to use them for a distraction, he paints them with plant dyes such as berry juice to stand out better and look more dangerous. He then either dumps the snakes directly onto an enemy or releases them into a room like he would a skunk, letting people’s fears do the damage.
Wombats are another traditional choice for goblin pet. These sixty-pound marsupials are herbivores, making them easy to feed, and as burrowing animals they make their own homes. Wombats are the right size for smaller goblins to ride, making them the only pet that is also a beast of burden. Lastly, wombats are cowardly animals that run at the first sight of danger. To other races this would disqualify them as mounts, but goblins consider this a plus. They don’t want a horse or griffon that would run headlong into a wall of spears or go straight at a wizard throwing fireballs, as this tends to result in both animal and rider dying in an incredibly messy way. The wombat’s survival instinct meshes quite nicely with that of the goblin’s, and both live to see another day.
The last goblin pet (and only one that can do damage) are bees. Bees are easy pets to keep, requiring no food or water, and are generally able to protect themselves from enemies. Goblins learned how to raise bees by watching humans who gather honey and bees wax from the hives. Goblins have little interest in honey, although they can eat it, but they know other races love it. They trade honey and wax to the few humans who will do business with them, generally getting metal tools in return. This is considered safer than dealing in cash, as fewer people rob victims for sweets.
But bees do more than produce trade goods. If a goblin settlement with beekeepers is attacked, the bees make potent weapons. Goblins throw hives at their enemies, sometimes even firing them out of large slingshots. The hives are destroyed on impact to release a cloud of enraged bees on the attackers. Swarming bees can’t inflict much damage, but their stings are painful and there are a lot of them. Worse, bees are small enough to get inside suits of armor by climbing through eye slits and joints, making them effective against knights. The bees usually cause enough chaos for the goblins to flee while their enemies slap at the bugs.
Goblins are renown for being stupid and crazy, but in the time they have lived near and observed other races, they have picked up some of their habits. Oddly enough, one of these is keeping pets. They avoid traditional choices such as dogs, cats, fish and birds. These animals are too big or too noisy or too demanding, and goblins just plain don’t like cats. But there are other animals that fit a goblin’s liking far more, and these can be an unpleasant surprise to their enemies.
One favorite pet is the skunk. Skunks are capable of producing an incredibly foul odor, but they only do so when scared. The rest of the time they are fairly calm animals, easy to care for and rather affectionate. Goblins that adopt skunks are very careful with their pets, making sure they have plenty of food and water, and keeping them away from danger, loud noises or other forms of stress. Then, at the proper time, the owner will release his pet into a crowded barracks, stores filled with customers, or the ever popular royal coronation. The skunk is sure to cause a panic whether it sprays people or not. Goblins also throw skunks at attackers, where the terrified animal is certain to release its stink.
Goblins also favor snakes as pets. Most people fear snakes, which is odd given that most snakes are neither poisonous nor all that aggressive. Goblins understand this and collect common snakes such as garter, milk and corn snakes, none of which is the least bit dangerous. They store the snakes in baskets near fireplaces to keep the cold-blooded animals warm. When the goblin owner needs to use them for a distraction, he paints them with plant dyes such as berry juice to stand out better and look more dangerous. He then either dumps the snakes directly onto an enemy or releases them into a room like he would a skunk, letting people’s fears do the damage.
Wombats are another traditional choice for goblin pet. These sixty-pound marsupials are herbivores, making them easy to feed, and as burrowing animals they make their own homes. Wombats are the right size for smaller goblins to ride, making them the only pet that is also a beast of burden. Lastly, wombats are cowardly animals that run at the first sight of danger. To other races this would disqualify them as mounts, but goblins consider this a plus. They don’t want a horse or griffon that would run headlong into a wall of spears or go straight at a wizard throwing fireballs, as this tends to result in both animal and rider dying in an incredibly messy way. The wombat’s survival instinct meshes quite nicely with that of the goblin’s, and both live to see another day.
The last goblin pet (and only one that can do damage) are bees. Bees are easy pets to keep, requiring no food or water, and are generally able to protect themselves from enemies. Goblins learned how to raise bees by watching humans who gather honey and bees wax from the hives. Goblins have little interest in honey, although they can eat it, but they know other races love it. They trade honey and wax to the few humans who will do business with them, generally getting metal tools in return. This is considered safer than dealing in cash, as fewer people rob victims for sweets.
But bees do more than produce trade goods. If a goblin settlement with beekeepers is attacked, the bees make potent weapons. Goblins throw hives at their enemies, sometimes even firing them out of large slingshots. The hives are destroyed on impact to release a cloud of enraged bees on the attackers. Swarming bees can’t inflict much damage, but their stings are painful and there are a lot of them. Worse, bees are small enough to get inside suits of armor by climbing through eye slits and joints, making them effective against knights. The bees usually cause enough chaos for the goblins to flee while their enemies slap at the bugs.
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