10 Tips for Better Negotiation Skills
They say that in life you get what you deserve, but in business you get what you… negotiate for.
If this saying is true – HOW ARE YOUR NEGOTIATIONS SKILLS?
Research shows that most men would look at negotiation as a game while women would look at it as going to the dentist for a root canal operation. Guess who has higher rates of success in negotiation?
Obviously when you treat negotiation as a painful process you would do your utmost to avoid it. But when your business is depended on it you are playing a losing game when you are not willing to negotiate.
You need to understand that everybody needs to negotiate from time to time; at work, at home, as a leader, as a sales person, and as a consumer. Therefore you need to view the process of negotiation not as a source of conflict but a place for cooperation.
The number 1 rule for all successful negotiations is – it has to be a Win-Win solution for BOTH sides. When you have this mindset you are ready to start improving you negotiation skills.
Here are 10 tips to improve your negotiation skills:
1. Ask for what you want
The biggest mistake you can make is not negotiating. Don’t look at the situation in terms of decisions you have to make, but as opportunities to negotiate. The last thing you want to have is an attitude of either accepting the offer or turning it down.
You need to understand that almost everything is negotiable, therefore you better ask for what you want!
2. Negotiate for yourself as if you were negotiating for someone else.
I realize that relationships are important for you and therefore you might take things personally.
However, if you come into the negotiation with a mindset that you are doing it for someone else you’ll find it easier even when turned down and will not see it as a personal rejection.
Remember negotiations are NEVER personal issue!
3. Become a good listener
This is your strong point, use it to your advantage. Women are great listeners and negotiators are like detectives. They ask probing questions and then remain silent. The other person will tell you everything you need to know – all you have to do is listen.
You can become an effective listener by allowing the other person to do most of the talking. Follow the 70/30 Rule – listen 70 percent of the time, and talk only 30 percent of the time. Encourage the other person to talk by asking lots of open-ended questions – questions that can’t be answered with a simple “yes” or “no.”
4. Focus on the other side’s needs, not yours.
Remember that the aim of every negotiation is a Win-Win solution. You need to come to the table KNOWING that you are going to get what you want. Your job is to find out what are the other person’s needs.
When you focus on your own needs, you miss the big picture. Instead, successful negotiators ask, “What are the REAL needs of the other side in this negotiation?” When you do it you will feel more powerful recognizing the reasons for the other side for the deal and being able to find solutions to it.
5. Master the details, but be flexible.
Preparation often enables women to get the respect they need to negotiate on a level playing field with men. But don’t get so stuck in the details that you lose sight of your ultimate goal. Just because you know something doesn’t mean everyone needs to know it.
6. Don’t make the first move
The best way to find out what are the other side objectives is to encourage them to open first. They may ask for less than you think. If you open first, you may give away more than is necessary.
7. Be patient
This is very difficult especially when you are not used to negotiation and all you want is to get over that stage. Whoever is more flexible about time has the advantage. Your patience can be the key to your success, especially if they other side is in a hurry.
8. Be willing to say “No”.
“No” is the most powerful word in negotiating, but many women have difficulty saying it. They want to keep everyone happy, to avoid conflict, to be liked, and to please. To be a good negotiator, you must be able to say no with firmness and credibility.
Always be willing to walk away – Never negotiate without options. If you depend too much on the positive outcome of a negotiation, you lose your ability to say “No”.
9. Don’t be afraid to break the rules.
In negotiating, there are no rules unless all the parties agree on them. You do not have to play by someone else’s rules when you negotiate. You can create the rules. Make sure you do not make assumptions that could go against you. Be willing to question EVERYTHING!
10. Lighten up
Humor is used when you negotiate not just to get a laugh, but also to ease the tension.
Women often think they won’t be taken seriously if they joke around, but most women run a bigger risk of being perceived as humorless.
Remember that sometimes it pays to laugh, even when a joke isn’t particularly funny. If you look at the negotiation as a game you can start having fun with it.
Now I’m curious….
What would be the negotiation skills would you need to master?
Share it with us in the comment box below - your tips, advice and experience when it comes to negotiation
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Have a magical week! Vered
