They Don’t Drive Pickups in New York
I was leafing through Frank Leslie’s Popular Monthly of April, 1892, in the hope of finding some material with which to greet the (hopefully) coming spring when I happened upon a romantic story entitled, ‘The Owner of LT Ranch.’ Since anything to do with ranching and cowboys is always of interest to me, I naturally had a quick read. What struck me immediately was the different ways in which the ranch owner, an easterner from New York, and the local characters were portrayed. To sum it up as best I can, a local rancher’s wife is depicted as introducing the heroine of the tale with the words, “un o’ our neighbors ‘cross the crick,” (sic) while the heroine refers to the hero as, “A real live New York gentleman out on the plains of Kansas—and he don’t know what a fence cutter is…”
Well, times have changed and the world is a smaller place thanks to television, Internet and the rest of the digital- and tele-communications upon which we so heavily rely nowadays. Local accents are smoothing out somewhat and airfreight makes the same foods available in Washington DC as in Washington state. While the average New Yorker may not have use for a fence cutter, he will most certainly know what they are.
Yet differences exist—they have to. We live in different geographies and different climates. Our histories are different as are our economies. Indigenous peoples created backgrounds to which lines of immigrants and settlors brought different cultures. As immigration continues to occur, it will continue to impact local populations. And differences exist within the west and within the east for the very same reasons. Boston is different from NYC, Denver is a contrast to Santa Fe and California is a law unto itself. In many ways, the southeast bears more resemblance to the west than it does to the north. So, in BROAD, GENERAL TERMS, what differences do I note when I, as that ‘real live’ New Yorker, find when, several times a year, I head west? With my tongue in the general vicinity of my cheek, here’s what I note:
In New York:
We don’t drive pickups. (Anything in the back would be stolen within seconds when parked);
Y’all is not a word;
Groceries are delivered to your door;
Dogs are generally small and have to be walked on a leash, and the owner has to collect the dog’s mess;
Gun clubs are predominantly cops and folks wanting to rob the local 7/11;
Two stepping is unknown, Texas two stepping totally unheard of;
Kenny Chesney is basically known as a former husband of Renee Zellwegger—few actually listen to his music;
A sprinkler system is to water the plants at your country retreat, not to water the foundation of your home in hot weather as in TX;
Not a cowboy hat/Stetson in sight except when the PBR comes to Madison Square Garden in January;
Jeans are rarely Levi’s or Wranglers;
Grass fed beef is something exotic on a menu not the cows out your window;
If you happen to keep a horse or at least ride, you ride English and wear English gear;
Horses are kept in a stable not a barn;
You don’t have a garbage disposal unit in your kitchen;
You cannot write about your ancestors horrific journey across the Great Plains as they headed west because the west was NYC to them;
You have no interesting outlaws in your ancestry nor do your forebears and relations include any Tys, Coles, Cals, Jesses, et.al;
Jack is the fellow your daughter is dating, not something in a glass;
A man who’s been rebuilt is a cartoon superhero, not a Professional
Bull Rider who’s had multiple accidents;‘Cowboy Poetry’ consists of Roy Rogers singing “Happy Trails”;
A plaid shirt with snaps is something worn to bed not out on the range;
A range is something you cook on;
Rocky Mountain Oysters are a strange ingredient on cooking shows which most people think are actual oysters;
We can live without a car though many don’t;
’Wide open spaces’ in NYC is Central Pk. measuring 1.317 sq. miles;
Cold in NYC is 30°, cold in the NW is -5°; very cold in NYC is 18°, very cold in the NW is -27°;
And finally: A cowboy is someone who is meant to repair something in your home, does a lousy job and overcharges NOT someone who rides a horse and looks after cattle
And is the hero of the west…
Please add to this list below. I will try not to take offense 
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AS part of the Fool for Romance blog hop, I am happy to be giving away one digital copy of my western historical romance, Loveland, to someone who likes my Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/writerAndrea... if you haven’t already and then answers the question: What is the setting for my story, Lawless Love? The answer should be sent via the comment box on this website at http://andreadowning.com/about/ and the answer can also be found on this website. The Fool for Romance blog hop runs all month.
