The Future Is Back At My Shack!

The cat got that time travel device working again here at our den. Of course the damn thing only told me the news in title form. I guess that is the norm. So away we go giving you the news of the future at my show.

2165: Oldest Person In The World Dies
I guess they had one too many pies?
Didn't even say their name.
The future is kinda lame.

3034: New Aliens Have Landed
Are they right or left handed?
Do they even have eyes?
I wonder if they are wise.

2016: Google Drive Helps Drunks
Put them in trunks.
Then no problem at all,
Drive them to their hall.

2050: Cubs Win The World Series
Puts an end to theories,
That they will never win.
Place a bet at your bin.

3666: Aliens Blow Us To Bits
Better hide when 666 hits.
I'll be long past dead though.
But at least future generations will know.

2063: Sailing Is Now Outlawed
Are we supposed to applaud?
I guess too much pollution in the sea,
They are just trying to protect thee.

2098: First Contact With Alien Life
You mean you actually talked to your wife?
Wow, what a great writer indeed.
I can't wait for another 85 years to come so I can read.

2154: Plants Mutate Into Killer Herbs
Better watch out if you live in the burbs.
They may strangle you.
Destroy all plants at your zoo.

2762: More People Live In Space Than On Earth
How much is a space house worth?
I'd rather stay here.
Being stuck in space I fear.

2953: Earth 4 Is Open For Everyone
What happened to the first three that spun?
I bet they went boom.
Thanks for the doom and gloom.

There you go, now you have lots to look forward to at your show. Might want to duck and cover though if you plan to live to be 2000 years old you know. Nasty aliens will come to pass. Keep them away from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.