Doesn't Anyone Ever Use the Toilet?
Early on New Year’s Day, I was sitting on the “throne” contemplating my New Year’s Resolutions when an epiphany washed over me. I can only guess, and time will tell, whether or not this sudden conceptual thought was indeed an epiphany. I’ve only read about epiphanies, you see; I’ve never actually experienced such a thing.
Whatever it was, this burst of inspiration caught me completely off guard. It was, as they say, ‘short and sweet'. Why don’t fictional characters ever have to use the toilet? Just like that… completely out of nowhere! Previously, I’d been thinking about revamping my website and adding some distinctive editorial review excerpts to my book’s product pages. Yes, at the time, I was actually using the toilet; still, that is such a normal, mundane and daily event that I can’t imagine any connection to this brilliant flash of insight.
It took a minute for me to reclaim the breath that had been knocked out of me before I began to run through a mental list of books and stories I’d read over the years, searching for a scene that included a character having to use the toilet at any time during his or her active scenes. I could recall only one… “Ocean’s Eleven”. Not a perfect example, but there was the scene where the bank robbers were digging the tunnel and one of them had to stop, back out of the tunnel and take care of business. The poor fellow had IBS, you understand? I wondered why so many novels included long, detailed philosophical and/or emotional meanderings, or detailed descriptions of places and things, neither of which had anything to do with the story’s premise or any of the story arcs; yet, there was never a scene interrupted by someone having to go to the toilet!
Is this reality? Is the lack of toilet use truly an example of the so-called verisimilitude necessary to establish a suspension of disbelief for the reader? Simply put… no! I added a new, New Year’s Resolution; henceforth, every book I write will include a toilet scene for at least one of the main characters. If you’re a writer, I hope you’ll join me in this effort to establish this detail of authenticity to your writing. If you’re a reader, I’m hopeful that you will recognize my efforts by including the fact that mine was the first book you’d read whereby a lead character actually has to break up a scene in order to… well, take care of business!
PS. Prior to posting, I recalled another toilet scene but not the title of the book. It entailed a soldier squatting and “making like a wild bear in the woods”, when an enemy soldier appeared. There were no words exchanged as the enemy pointed his rifle at the poor soul and sympathetically waited until he’d wiped himself before pulling the trigger. Okay, not actually a toilet scene, but poignant nonetheless.
Whatever it was, this burst of inspiration caught me completely off guard. It was, as they say, ‘short and sweet'. Why don’t fictional characters ever have to use the toilet? Just like that… completely out of nowhere! Previously, I’d been thinking about revamping my website and adding some distinctive editorial review excerpts to my book’s product pages. Yes, at the time, I was actually using the toilet; still, that is such a normal, mundane and daily event that I can’t imagine any connection to this brilliant flash of insight.
It took a minute for me to reclaim the breath that had been knocked out of me before I began to run through a mental list of books and stories I’d read over the years, searching for a scene that included a character having to use the toilet at any time during his or her active scenes. I could recall only one… “Ocean’s Eleven”. Not a perfect example, but there was the scene where the bank robbers were digging the tunnel and one of them had to stop, back out of the tunnel and take care of business. The poor fellow had IBS, you understand? I wondered why so many novels included long, detailed philosophical and/or emotional meanderings, or detailed descriptions of places and things, neither of which had anything to do with the story’s premise or any of the story arcs; yet, there was never a scene interrupted by someone having to go to the toilet!
Is this reality? Is the lack of toilet use truly an example of the so-called verisimilitude necessary to establish a suspension of disbelief for the reader? Simply put… no! I added a new, New Year’s Resolution; henceforth, every book I write will include a toilet scene for at least one of the main characters. If you’re a writer, I hope you’ll join me in this effort to establish this detail of authenticity to your writing. If you’re a reader, I’m hopeful that you will recognize my efforts by including the fact that mine was the first book you’d read whereby a lead character actually has to break up a scene in order to… well, take care of business!
PS. Prior to posting, I recalled another toilet scene but not the title of the book. It entailed a soldier squatting and “making like a wild bear in the woods”, when an enemy soldier appeared. There were no words exchanged as the enemy pointed his rifle at the poor soul and sympathetically waited until he’d wiped himself before pulling the trigger. Okay, not actually a toilet scene, but poignant nonetheless.
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