Flight to Chicago with Grouchy McGroucherson

Nobody wants to get stuck sitting on an airplane next to that chatty asshole who's going on and on (and on) about shit you don't care about.

However, you can maybe smile and say hello to the person you're seated next to. Or at least not scowl at them. Otherwise, you never know what'll happen…

I arrive at my seat, coffee in hand, excited to be flying to Chicago to visit my friend Jen.

Grouchy is already seated and rolls his eyes when I walk up to take my seat. Nice to see you too.

I toss my bag...