Darkness and Light

If I could say one thing to you—and to myself—in the midst of the self-improvement vortex of January, it would be, “You are delightful just the way you are.” That’s right. You, the one with the Christmas tree still up on January 13 (that’s me), you are an amazing human being. You simply have so many creative impulses that the domestic ones sometimes get lost in the shuffle. And that’s OK.

And you, the women I see running yourselves ragged trying to be a supermom while looking like a supermodel, you don’t have to prove your worth. You are already worthy. The size two label is not your legitimizer, nor are the achievements of your children.

And you, sweet girls I see on my phone grasping at approval based on likes and followers, striking sexy poses just to get the next click. Every image you post could disappear today, and your inner light would not be diminished one bit.

Men and women caught up in the vicious cycle of achievement, gathering acceptance in the form of raises, promotions and awards, rest assured that your family and friends love you for who you are, not for what you do. Close your eyes and remember you are a human being, not a human doing.

When did we start thinking we had to be good at everything? When did it become unacceptable to have weaknesses to counterbalance our strengths? And why do we look outside for what is innately within us?

A novel approach, perhaps, but maybe we should launch this year by accepting our unique combination of strengths and weaknesses, rather than trying to eradicate our weaknesses with resolutions and white-knuckled will-power. Maybe, just maybe, we’d live more holistic lives if we could lean into our authentic selves—the darkness and the light.

Here’s to resolving to embrace them both.