Tour drabble from DC!

From Emily at the Borders at Bailey's Crossroads event near Washington DC comes the prompt "Maximus and virgins" (this prompt may be more understandable if you know that I am reading my Team Unicorn short story from the upcoming anthology Zombies vs Unicorns while on tour).

This one's an AU. :D

"First of all, I don't want to eat any of you lot," Maximus said, "and if I did, I don't see how that would make any difference to the taste."

He felt rather injured at the suggestion; he had only meant...