I Know Why You Want to Do Drugs, Drink and Eat A Gallon of Ice Cream Until You Throw Up

There is a reason people with bipolar abuse so many substances- I can add stupid sex, quitting jobs, leaving the country and driving like a maniac to the above list!

We hurt sometimes- and when the meds don’t work or we refuse the meds or the side effects grab us by the neck, we want relief.

When you have an illness that affects the emotions, relief often comes in dangerous packages. Danger makes you feel alive- we do dangerous things to FEEL something.  We do dangerous things to NOT feel something.

It’s human. So if you have bipolar and you get destructive when you’re sick, you’re normal.

There is a solution.

The solution is to manage the illness and use your good days to set up checks and balances that will prevent the dangerous behavior on the bad days.

For example, when my depression is bad, I isolate myself.  As you may have guessed, I’m not exactly an introvert. If I could have a reality TV show record my every movement, I would. I would love it because that would help me feel alive.

It’s better than taking too much Vicodin or eating a half gallon of Bryer’s Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream.

We are regular people under these mood swings.  Regular people struggle with dangerous behaviors, so imagine what it’s like for those of us who don’t get to choose our own moods?

I’m a striver- I strive to manage this illness. I strive to live.  This past year changed me profoundly-  it was a tough year and I made it through. I will not let this life be wasted.  Writing this blog  is my way of giving the finger to this illness.

It will not get me and it doesn’t have to get you either!

We can stay stable together!

Julie

Related posts:
Finding a Purpose
Throw out your junky clothes Julie!
Julie, Is it Possible to Have a Life free from Depression?