How to Handle Negative Reviews
To my fellow author friends: stop whining about negative reviews. Seriously, now, do you really expect every person in the world to understand the heart of your stories? If you are an honest writer, then you’re writing from your heart and not simply to make a few bucks. That being said, some people aren’t going to “get” you. Just like they don’t in real life. Some people think you’re crazy. Some people think you’re boring. Whatever the case, it’s you. Who you are. And it’s a good thing!
The best writers, in my opinion, are the ones who write from the heart. The ones who write what they love and know. When you read my books you are reading pieces of my life. My thoughts and dreams and desires. Yeah, I’m extreme to some people. I have my head in the clouds and have been deemed strange and idealistic by many people. I’m a little eccentric, odd, and frazzled sometimes. I battle between pride/ego and pride/insecurity. I’m a person with my own flaws and strengths. And I’m not you. So, if you like my books, chances are you are like me or, at the very minimum, you would be my friend if we crossed paths.
So, my dear writerly friends, here’s some advice for a different approach to your negative reviews. No more whining and trying to get them erased. No more pining over the fact that people hate what you write. You know, I could get 1000 negative reviews and 1 positive and it wouldn’t matter. Here’s why:
1.) When people reject your stories they aren’t rejecting you, they are affirming themselves. See? It’s not an offense to you, no matter how mean their review may seem, some people feel that the only way they can affirm their own beliefs is by dragging down others. That’s okay! At least they are passionate!
2.) For someone to hate your story and another to love it shows that your story is real. It’s honest. It’s life as you see it or want to see it. One of my most treasured persons is Tupac Shakur. Does everyone agree? Certainly not! Could we get into heated arguments over the beauty of Tupcac’s character? Probably. Because we have different eyes. We see life and people differently. Naturally, people will hate your stories. They very stories you spent months laboring over with love and excitement. It’s okay though. Don’t fret. Some people will see the story differently than you and that’s okay.
3.) I’m not a negative reviewer. If I don’t like a book, I don’t review it. If I can’t finish a book, I definitely don’t review it. But we live in a world where critique and opinion are practically considered virtues. So it’s normal to browse every bestseller and find a bazillion negative reviews, even when the positive outweigh the negative. It’s normal! Normal! Normal!
My point: we live in a culture raised on opinion. And because we all see life through different eyes, our most precious stories are going to be boring and stupid to some people. Terrible, ghastly, wretched. You’ll get it all. Lame characters, dumb plot lines, writing weaker than Great Depression coffee. And my advice to you is: stop ignoring the bad reviews. Grab a cup of tea and read them. Gain something from them. Learn about other people, what they like, dislike, etc. What sets them off? What tickles their fancy? Life is beautiful when we learn to see it from all angles, not just our own. So appreciate the critique you’re given just as much as you appreciate the praise. We can learn something from all of it. About life. People. And stories.
And perhaps, if we learn to take it all in, we’ll become better writers because of it. Maybe we’ll even tick people off by writing exactly what they hate, even more intensely, simply because that which they hate is the depth of what we love.
Be yourself. Write what you love. Don’t write to please others. Write from within and those who love it will love it … those who hate it can hate it too. It’s all part of the beauty that is life and expression. Enjoy it!!
