When I told you that I loved you for the first time, I didn’t know that you were going to take those...

When I told you that I loved you for the first time, I didn’t know that you were going to take those words and use their meaning against me. How was I to know that you were vulnerable in that moment of good intentional truth? You think that you are able to read me like a psychic can read the future on a palm, but I am not as open as the door that you left through when you walked out on me when all I needed was the actuality of your heart. I never meant to make you feel as if I was closing in on you without your condolences. I wouldn’t have ever surrounded you with promises of a life that would be full of concentrated hope if I knew that tomorrow you would no longer see me in the light. I never thought that someone would push away love just because the one who is offering everything they have is someone who can hardly admire themselves. For so long I’ve wanted to apologize to you for being a burden on the way you see yourself today. If I knew back then what I know now about you, I wouldn’t have ever made my heart as soft as it is. And now the only thing that I have left from your affections is a misguided judgment, and second guesses that only involve myself, and the way I view effort.