I have the resources to handle this pain.

It was one of those days, pain was an unwelcome friend that seemed to never leave. The painkillers were not doing their job and it seemed just to much to handle. 

“God this is so hard” I cried silently. ‘This journey is way to difficult, can you just give me a rest. I am so sick of learning lessons from pain.”  

Than I heard him clearly. “I have given you to much to handle”, I heard God say. 

What? I must have heard that wrong.  That can’t be right.

“Yes darling daughter I have given you to much to handle by yourself. But I have given you the resources to walk this journey. I have given you myself. If you trust me, lean on me, obey me, I will carry you through this hard time. I will never ask you to walk this path alone. I am here but you must learn to stop trying to do it alone because you will never make it on your own.”

“Use the resources of prayer, read my love letter ( the Bible ) pour out your pain, sorrows and broken dreams to me and I will strengthen you.” 

Suddenly I see that illness is not a curse but a way to draw ever closer to the one who holds my life. With him holding me, I see hope, a future and beauty from pain!