i need to stop regretting the impulsive things that i do. mostly when i wanted to do it in the...

i need to stop regretting the impulsive things that i do. mostly when i wanted to do it in the first place. i over-think everything too much. so much to a point where i make situations up in my head that may never, and probably will never happen. mostly when it involves another person. it makes me uneasy knowing that i did something that may have been too forward, or too strange, or too just, too soon. i am so terrified of confrontation. mostly the kind where i know i’m the one at fault. it makes me feel almost hollow when someone intimidating looks me in the eyes. i hardly speak about what goes on in my mind. or anymore at least. i just write poetry and smoke cigarettes. i used to be so open. i think the feeling of rejection is what has made me so silent as of lately. i think i care too much, but then i hear i don’t care enough, and then when i do something that i think is spontaneous, i usually end up wishing i would have never done it at all. i need to just trust my gut. even if it seems chaotic.