Official Judges’ Response to THE EXILE RETURNS

Here is the official judges’ responses to my Flash Fiction Entry “The Exile Returns” (http://stephenmatlock.com/2013/09/the-exile-returns/)

WHAT THE JUDGE(S) LIKED ABOUT YOUR STORY

This piece was quite inventive. I liked the details of the fantastical world with which you imbued the narrative. Excellent character development, as well. Really nice work

You have a clear knack for fantasy writing! There are some lovely turns of phrase here, and your grasp of structure and narrative momentum is really strong. Kudos

WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK

I think you got a trifle mired in too many details considering the limitations as to length here. It reads as if it were a longer piece, or wants to be a longer piece, but you were forced to edit, edit, edit. You might consider sticking with the tale and adding to it

In the beginning, there are a few too many cliché fantasy marks for me: the “elf high-prince of the Golden City,” maidens, a Council… all feels ripped out of Middle Earth. But slowly you reveal yourself as having more unique concerns, and I hope you can find a way to truly build a unique world without relying on the traditional tropes