#647 When batteries are included

I’m the Robin Hood of batteries.

Since I am an extremely cheap person I always rob from the rich, battery-filled remotes on my couch and give to the poor new gadgets laying on my counter. I stumble around Sherwood Living Room, clicking open plastic battery doors, hunting for dependable double-As to get the job done.

Of course, this battery robbery always backfires next time I sit down to watch a flick. I plop onto the couch and pick up the lighter-than-usual remote and then curse my former self for screwing my current self. Then the camera pans to another scene of me stumbling around again, this time battery-jacking the poor so I can feed the rich.

It’s a terrible, neverending cycle.

That’s what makes it special when batteries are included. That’s what makes it special when when you yank open the new Baby Farts-So-Real and there’s a small, plastic-wrapped case of cheapo batteries from the Taiwanese black market sitting in the box.

Sure, sure, maybe those knockoff Ultra-Power or Extra-V Vvoltage batteries don’t inspire the most confidence, but whatever man, because surprise batteries are a big win every time.

It’s like the company is saying “Come on, let’s get going, people.”

“First round’s on us.”

AWESOME!

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Hey everybody,

It’s he-ere! Yes, the 2014 Page-A-Day Calendar of Awesome has arrived! This one’s got over 30% new material and I’ve asked for a special coupon code for readers of 1000 Awesome Things. If you live in the US and want to snag 25% of your calendar and free shipping, just order from this link on the Chronicle Books website and use the coupon code AWESOME.

Neil

p.s. Unfortunately, the page-a-day calendar sold out well before Christmas the past two years so grab one soon if you’re feeling it. I sincerely appreciate the support and through projects like the calendar you’ve got my word I’ll always keep this blog ad free.

 

Photos from: here