The First Heartbreak: Helping Your Daughter Through Romantic Disappointments
Watching your little girl fall in love for the first time can be an interesting experience, but as an older and more experienced person, you know that young love rarely lasts. Therefore, your daughter’s first love will more than likely lead to her first heartbreak, and when that day comes, it’s important that you be prepared to help soothe her wounds.
Try Not to Judge
No matter who is to blame for the breakup, try to remain as non-judgmental as you can. If you disliked the boyfriend, now is not the time to verbally bash him. Instead, let your daughter do most of the talking. Never criticize her behavior at this time. If, during the relationship, you noticed certain mistakes on her part, wait until she is through the initial heartbreak to discuss them with her. Teens need to be allowed the freedom to make their own mistakes.
Be Around More
If you can, hang around the house a little more after your daughter’s breakup. She will probably choose to spend a lot of time alone in her room, but during those rare moments when she finds herself in the mood to vent, it will help to have her mom around. This isn’t to say that you have to rearrange your entire schedule, just try to avoid going on a week-long getaway with your girlfriends during the time your daughter needs you the most.
Make Her Feel Good
When she is past the initial stage of post-relationship grief, it’s time to take your daughter out for some serious girl time. Go shopping, get manicures, have your hair done, and talk about anything and everything. Not only will it help bring the two of you closer and help her forget about the breakup, it will teach her life skills that can help her better manage breakups in the future.
Create a Sense of Comfort and Normalcy
They say time heals all wounds, which means that the sooner you can get your daughter’s world feeling normal, the easier it will be for her to move on. After giving her a few days to experience the heartbreak and emotionally rebound, encourage her to get back to her normal activities. Do everything you can to make her environment feel safe and comfortable, including taking the time to watch movies as a family and make her favorite home-cooked meals.
Watching your little girl experience her first romantic disappointments may feel like heartbreak yourself, but it’s important to remember that these experiences will help her grow into the strong woman she can become.
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