The Importance of Warning Labels

It has become apparent to me over the past couple of weeks that my work is in need of very large bold print warnings. Why you ask? So that misguided idiots looking for the next "Twilight" can move the hell on without shitting all over my work. Now it may just be me, but when a book's synopsis implies an apocalyptic war with man eating monsters, and ends with "liberal amounts of action and gore", I expect there to be graphic violence. It would appear to me that some people, expect a delightful romantic romp with an occasional slap fight.

For a time I was feeling pretty good about my book. People were downloading it, not many mind you, but some. I was getting some positive feedback from readers here and there. My friends liked it very much. Then I got a review from a hysterical woman that, at least from what she posted, is traumatized for life.

The review was scathing, but also confusing. You see she had a "synopsis" of the book in her review. The part of the plot she identified as the most offensive? It didn't occur! She was obviously skimming and completely misunderstood what was happening. She implied she read the book and it was a complete disaster; spelling way out of whack, misused words, no connection between the scenes. There is no possible way she read the whole thing, she got offended by the violence and decided to go on a rant.


I was willing to take most of that on the chin. I did want the plot misrepresentation changed, as it is lies. What did I get for politely asking this woman if she actually finished the book? A mod telling me that I'm not allowed to, and then threatening to ban me for it. I feel sufficiently violated by the situation. Someone is allowed to misrepresent and slander my work, but I am not allowed to call them on it? That is ridiculous.
There's also been some negative feedback regarding the plot, or lack thereof as some put it. Those who said this invariably admitted to not being past the 30% mark. That may be my fault as I intended to have a sequence of stories about various characters that are loosely related and have them connect more and more as the book progresses. Evidently, this idea is lost on some people. A few also said my blurb is misleading, though that as well is a load of shit. If any of them had actually read it, they would know that.


The practical upshot of this is that I've altered the blurb for my book in hopes of fixing this problem. Most notably, I've added a frequent graphic violence and explicit language advisory at the bottom. Perhaps this will discourage the weak kneed Disney Princesses from dragging down my books rating any further.