Ask General Kang: If you were running the World Cup, would you ban the vuvuzela?

First of all, we should explain what a vuvuzela (pronounced vu-vu-zay-la) isn't. It is not, as it sounds, the delicate private parts of a female Venezuelan sex dancer. It is a long, brightly colored plastic horn that can only be played in one pitch.

And it is delightful.

I would never ban it. Ever. In fact, I'd find a way to weaponize it. You see, you're forgetting two things:

1) on my homeworld, Neecknaw, where I was undisputed and much-feared ruler for some time, some of my favourite...