"I just graduated from college."“What’d you...

"I just graduated from college."

“What’d you study?”

“I majored in history and political science, and minored in Chinese studies, international studies, and economics.”

“Wow, how long did that take you?”

“Five years. I would have done it in four but I brought back a blood parasite from China.”

“That’s pretty epic. I’ll use that for your caption.”

“Can you write one more thing?”

“What’s that?”

“Write: ‘He misses his girlfriend. He knows it’s for the best. But he misses his girlfriend.’”