Well hello darlings!

As Dame Edna Everage would say, and who am I to contradict her?

You wouldn’t believe what an awful month I’ve had!

Anchoring the petite yacht (that’s what I’m calling our outboard motor boat) off deserted white-sand beaches in Corfu…

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Trying to decide what to eat in Trogir, Croatia……mmm, perhaps pancakes with chocolate and walnut sauce?

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And nice to see that torture is still in fashion in the modern medieval city (in this case Sibenik)!

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Checking out the Erotic Museum in Kezthely, Hungary.  (Likely conversation of museum entry office “But she doesn’t LOOK 18..”, “Yes, but her mother is with her.  It must be alright..”)

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And lounging glamorously among lily pads in Heviz’s bath-temperature thermal lake…it’s easy to feel glamorous when all your competition is over 70.

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Yep, I’ve had a month’s holiday in Europe, I’m finally back, and what’s more amazing, Ms M is back too.  I did seriously yearn to leave her at the train station sometimes, tapping away on the ever-present BLOODY IPOD!  But no, mother love won out, and we’re both back, and it’s time to find out what everybody is up to!  I see that Tess has AGAIN copped the Curse of the Slippers, White Lady’s reminiscing fondly about nearly getting blown up, the Hook is mumbling something about being sleepy and loving vampires, Hollyanne’s poem about going to the supermarket as a pumpkin ALMOST rhymes..in short, life goes on without me.  Although, thank you to everyone who visited while I was away – I will recompense you richly, soon (ish)

And finally, I’ve begun..well sort of begun…to write my new book.  It WILL be a bestseller.  I know because I’ve been reading a ton of the damn things and I think I’ve got a handle on how they go now.  Shades of Grey, Twilight, White Princess…you name it, I’ve ploughed through it (ok, I may have missed out a few. Hundred).  Anyway soon to come…the first back stories of Rose’s liver-crunching, breath-holding, down-there wrenching trilogy about the end of life as we know it….

What ARE the essential elements of a bestseller….?