Follow Your Flow
I’ve discussed the concept of the “flow” in my life before but never in a written medium, and I think I really need to, especially with some reason information that has appeared in my life.
I don’t tend to live my life by a set of predetermined morals or morality in general; many things I would consider perfectly acceptable are things many others would find terrible. But this is more due to the fact that morality is being able to draw the line where things are good and things are evil. And nothing is ever that case in real life. I simply chose to live my life as it comes with the idea that I may do anything in my life, anything at all, But if I chose, I will choose to do what benefits me, or benefits someone around me. In essence it comes down to a ‘lesser of two evils’ kind of thing, except with way more than just two evils (or goods) to choose from.
This identity around morality is actually already established as a religion, one that I don’t follow, but I do take pieces of its tenants as my own. That religion is Taoism (Daoism) and you may know it from it’s incredibly famous simple of the Yin-Yang. And actually the book that this religion comes from is used all throughout China, and many Chinese people follow the words of wisdom in the book (Tao Te Ching) regardless of their own personal religion.
In the Tao Te Ching (Often credited to Laozi) it states a few key phrases that have grounded me. The first is in consideration of the above remarks I made around my morality.
“When goodness is lost, it is replaced by morality.”
The idea is that if you already need to ‘establish’ a morality then you are already pushing the lines of what you had deemed was good and what you deemed was bad in your gut. You already did something that you didn’t think was ‘good’ and then feel to protect yourself and prove you are good you have to establish what you believe is morally right and wrong across the board. Sometimes good things can look wicked, and some times the most wicked things can look incredibly good.
The very act of establishing a morality pushes you into a zone that leads to the next phrase.
“When people see some things as beautiful, other things become ugly.
When people see some things as good, other things become bad.”
Putting this phrase simply means… judging will hurt your view of the world. The reason I don’t establish my morality and why some things I do many people have considered ‘bad’ is because they’ve already decided what is good, an action, that doesn’t take into account the moment, or the situation… in essence people who judge are not aware of the flow, let alone following it.
And so we get to the flow. Which, believe it or not there is a Taoism ideal around this very same concept. It was made more famous by Bruce Lee with his style of martial arts stating that ‘you must be like water‘ which actually comes directly from another phrase that Laozi had used in the Tao Te Ching. Two phrases in fact. The first is:
“The best people are like water, which benefits all things and does not compete with them.
It stays in lowly places that others reject. This is why it is so similar to the Way.”
This phrase talks in the same light as Bruce Lee in saying that being like water is a good thing, the best that you can be, because water does not judge, it flows, or sits, or remains where it must, based on what is around it. And this is the very basic concept of what the flow is… or as once again Taoist might put it: Wu Wei
Wu Wei when translated actually has multiple meanings, not all of which I will be talking about as I will just be focusing on one of the meanings which is: Flowing with the moment. Some of the other meanings include ‘non-force’ and ‘acting spontaneously’ and ‘non-action’.
This is in essence what ‘The Flow’ is. A mutable concept to show that you are best yourself when you are acting spontaneously without acting. Or… Flowing in the moment. Now, I’m not going to speak for Wu Wei or Taoist belief because as I’ve said before I am not Taoist, they simply have the language that helps me better explain my concept.
The flow is important to me. It’s why I tend to stay almost entirely within the moment, and it’s why I often seem so ‘laid back’ as many people have put it. Because like water, I react to what comes at me, within the moment, rather than adjusting myself ahead of time. The irony in this is that my reflexes are actually terrible and I can take more than a few seconds to think of things I want to say, which means I can seem like I stumble over words at times or just keep quiet entirely. Which keeping quiet is another phrase from Laozi about how people who know nothing are the ones breaking the silence.
This staying in the present is far more important to me than morality honestly. I’d rather follow my flow which can lead me down hundreds of paths, than stop myself because I thought something was morally wrong. I should explain a bit more of what the ‘flow’ is to me though. As it’s not just being in the moment, it’s more like a feeling I get in the moment.
Have you ever saw someone and instantly realized that somewhere down the line you and that person would fall in love? Or how about just instantly knowing something about a person when you see them, even though it should have been something you would need to ask them about?
That is what the flow is all about. It’s a feeling stuck in you that informs you of one or another direction you should go. It’s that feeling you get when you just know that you need to go down the street, or need to stop and help someone jump their truck. You don’t HAVE to do those things, but somewhere deep within you, you just get the feeling that you need to do them. That is the flow, it’s a stream you follow, a path you go down, and everyone has one.
This shouldn’t be confused with destiny though, destiny you have no choice over. With the flow it is all entirely your choice, you can choose to not stop and help jump that truck, and you won’t even feel that you had missed something, because your flow will eventually find you again and give you another feeling you can follow or not. But generally, if you follow that feeling of the flow you find your life to have a lot more meaning and power and understanding than you would normally.
I can’t say I’ve always followed my flow, but I keep to it as often as possible, and to do so means I often don’t plan, or expect things to happen and just kind of do them as they come and stop doing them as they go instead. It’s made me incredibly adaptable to life and the world around me, faster than most of the people around me. And the flow doesn’t always provide me with things that are morally right to most people. I’ve cheated on some people by following the flow, I’ve gotten others to cheat on their loved ones because of the flow, but in doing so the flow always led me to something that I found perfect. I may have gotten someone to cheat on their loved one, but it resulted in that person making a decision that would change their life for the better, a decision they never could have made if they hadn’t done what I provoked them to do.
Often times my flow leads me to a lot of ‘poetic justice’ kind of things. Some times I’ve done bad things, and some times as a result I get to see incredibly good things come out of it. And some times that doesn’t always happen. Regardless I’ve learned to follow my flow more often these days and stick with it. However, the future has been getting in my way, as well as the past. And I think if there is one phrase that can sum up the power of following the flow. It’s this:
“If you are depressed, you are living in the past.
If you are anxious, you are living in the future.
If you are at peace, you are living in the present.”
Guess which one is the best to live in? I can properly account for all the times I’ve been depressed being a result of me thinking about the past. And all the times I’ve shown anxiety or anxiousness I’ve been thinking of what might happen in the future (especially with people and conversations). But most of all… all the times I’ve just felt… absolutely at peace I’ve just been living my life, following my flow, and taking things right as they appeared in my present.
As a final note I highly recommend reading the Tao Te Ching if you can get your hands on it, and if not, there are still some great quotes you can find from it if you look up Laozi.
