Where's my free wi-fi?

I'm on the road a lot, and I've learned something about wi-fi availability in lodging: The higher the thread count of the sheets, the less likely the chance of having free internet access in the room.
Seriously, the scuzzy, scabby chains always have free wi-fi, but the nicer places like Westin charge you about $10 a day. Go figure. I'd rather they forego the nightly turn-down service with free chocolates and give me some free access instead.
More lodging news: Remember the TV news segment...