AUTHORS AND EGOS.

There is really nothing wrong with ego as long as one does not allow it to become inflated. In fact, I think ego is a good thing. It spurs us on, it allows us some pride. It is a sad thing if someone has lost their ego. This generally does not occur with writers. We may write for ourselves but in the final count, most of us definitely want others to read…and hopefully like, what we have written. Why else are there millions of people out there writing their stories in this age of self-publishing? Just about everyone today has written, or knows someone who has written, or is writing, or is planning to write, their story. Why else am I, and others like me, blogging.


So many of us want to speak, we want to be heard. And whether anyone cares what we write or not, we have this great desire to share out thoughts.


I am no different. I want to communicate – whether it be by writing or in conversation. I have been known to gabble on but I hope I am not one of those I have heard of ‘ who have nothing to say yet keep repeating it’.


And so, in this quest for communication, I have written several books about myself. First, I was privileged to write The Khaki Mafia with Robin Moore (author of The French Connection and many others.) This was indeed a privilege because Robin was a well established author and I had much to learn.  He was generous in sharing his knowledge and time. One of the things he often repeated was “There are many writers out there who write beautiful words but have nothing to say.” Robin always had plenty to say…while holding the reader’s interest. I hope I have learned to do the same.


The Khaki Mafia was actually a true story of the corruption I encountered within the U.S. Army clubs in Vietnam and how I risked my life when I ‘blew the whistle.’ Robin said that it would sell better if presented as fiction so we changed the names and embellished a few facts. He was right. It sold a million copies.


Since then I have written the true story of the same events. In Goodbye Junie Moon I did not write in depth about the corruption as I did not want a repeat of our first book. I was trying to show how the events effected and changed me. A few ( very few) readers have complained about this, saying they wanted a deeper look at the corruption and less of me. (It is a memoir – which usually means a good look at the author. )


More recently, I wrote the sequel, Junie Moon Rising.


Promoting a book today is vastly different from the days when Robin and I wrote The Khaki Mafia. Back then, we were treated like celebrities as our publisher set up TV appearances and book signing tours for us. We traveled the country accompanied by a PR woman. We were accommodated in five star hotels and all our TV, magazine and newspaper interviews were pre-arranged.


I long for those days now, as I slog away, trying to write this blog, chat on Facebook and Twitter and other writer’s forums. And sadly, I am not very good at this new type of promotion, being rather inept at computer savvy.


My latest attempt at promoting Goodbye Junie Moon occurred between the 17th – 21st July. I offered the book for free during those days through amazon. Much to my delight, 33,000+ people downloaded the free copies. This is turn, generated an additional forty six reviews to date. Now reviews help sell books and prior to that Freebie, my reviews were pretty good and I must admit, I was beginning to get a swelled head. This last week has certainly brought me crashing back to earth. Some of those ladies who downloaded the freebies have not liked the story at all – couldn’t even finish it. I was found to be, raunchy, horny, boring and ungrammatical. One even asked for a refund. (LOL). Now, this should not matter. While writing, I did not have to put myself ‘out there’, warts and all. But I did, hiding nothing – the good and the bad. At times my life was raw. Sure I could tell the good things about myself and sugar-coat the bad. But that would not be honest and discerning readers know and appreciate honesty.


I have always been a person who danced to my own tune and never gave a fig (funny saying, that.) what others thought of me, as long as I liked myself. So why should I care about some negative (Not constructive) reviews? Especially when they were so outnumbered by the good ones.


Ego, of course E.G.O! I’m a little bit ashamed of that. I know better. I am bigger than that. Have I become a whiner? So many writers have endured the same rejection – the same criticism, and accepted it in silence.  So if other people’s opinions never mattered before, what is different? Is it because I am older? I think not! I believe that whereas my ego is within bounds generally, when it comes to my writing, it is desperate for approval. Stupid woman! My brain tells me that we can’t please everyone. We are all different. Let it be water off a duck’s back! I’m certainly not alone and even far better writers than me get negative reviews. So bring them on – and shut up, June.


And now for the happy ending. After that huge whinge, here is the end result; CONTROVERSY sells books! Although my rating has dropped a few points, my book has never sold so well. Take heart fellow authors and welcome those negative reviews. Smile as you run to the bank!


Until next time, Cheers.



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Published on August 15, 2013 01:11
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message 1: by Lilo (new)

Lilo Hi, June,

You seem to be a bit like me. I also keep getting into trouble for not keeping my mouth shut and speaking up against evil.


message 2: by Lilo (new)

Lilo Forgot to tell you: We also tried to adopt kids from Third World countries but were considered not young and healthy enough by German authorities. So we ended up adopting homeless cats. (We now have 31 of them.)


message 3: by June (new)

June Collins Nice to meet you Lilo. It is ridiculous how hard (and expensive) they make it to adopt these children. Sometimes you wonder if they prefer to leave the children out there suffering. The agencies said I could not adopt because I was too old at 40. So ridiculous. My mother was still bearing children in her 40's and I was not looking for a baby but for children - even handicapped children.
Eventually I found an American nun in a Catholic Monastery in India who offered to help me. With a lawyer she put me in touch with, I was able to adopt a 6 year old through the Indian courts. The trouble was, I could not bring him to the USA without homestudy approval through an American agency. Once I circumvented the agencies and found my own child, they had little excuse to fail me on the homestudy. I wrote about it (briefly) in Junie Moon Rising.
Hope you have enjoyed your cats. I'm a dog person myself. I'm a bird lover so don't like cats around.
I am not very active on Goodreads. Maybe I should try to rectify that one day. You can find me on Facebook under both Junie Moon and June Collins.
I admire anyone who opens their mouth to right a wrong. We need more of it. Cheers Lilo.


message 4: by Lilo (last edited Aug 18, 2013 12:01PM) (new)

Lilo Nice to meet you, too, June. I think we are one of a kind; that is, ready to fight for something we believe in (i.e. righting a wrong). In Germany, a woman ready to fight is called a "Kampfhenne". There is no real equivalent for "Kampfhenne" in the English language. The verbal translation is "fighting hen". There is no male equivalent for this expression either. I think it is considered normal for men to fight for what they believe in but unusual for women. One is usually called a "Kampfhenne" with a smile.

To the topic of adoptions from Third World countries I would like to add the following: I was 48 years old, my husband was 45. We wanted to adopt two girls from India, ages 5 to 10. German authorities denied our adoption application as they considered us too old and not healthy enough. Admitted, we were neither the healthiest nor the youngest, but we would have been able to give two unwanted Indian girls a good life, certainly a better life than they could expect in India.

There would have been a way to circumvent this denied application. We could have gone to India and bought children on the street. (We would have had no qualms doing this as any mother who sells a child is either a bad mother or unable to give the child a life.) Then we could have taken the children to Germany with a perjured affidavid that my husband had fathered the children. With my husband denying a blood test, German law would have required authorities to allow the children to be brought into the country.

We decided against this circumvention. My husband didn't have the nerve, and we both had qualms to commit perjury.

However, other people have gone this path. The funny thing is: Bright blond, German men have brought pitch-black babies from Africa, claiming in an affidavit that they had fathered these children, and the German authorities could do nothing against it. Had to let these children into Germany.

Yes, we do enjoy our 31 cats (and 2 dogs), even though they keep turning our modern furniture into antiques and my husband, meanwhile, thinks that he studied physics to be qualified for doing litterboxes.

Hope you get more active on Goodreads. It is my first attempt on social media, and it took me several months to learn how to navigate it without causing ship-wrecks. I have signed up for facebook, but after stumbling around on it like a blind chicken, I have set it aside for a while; otherwise, I would never get my two books launched.

P.S. Our cats are not allowed to catch birds (or rabbits, or ground squirrels, or chipmunks, or lizards). I must admit, however, that they don't always listen, but most will surrender their prey before it is injured.


message 5: by Lilo (last edited Aug 18, 2013 08:32PM) (new)

Lilo Sorry, this comment got so long. I am afraid I talk too much. (That's probably why I became a writer.)


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