Ruminating On: Oprah vs. Fatberg

A long, long time ago in a blog-o-sphere far, far away, I used to post a picture everyday and ask you your thoughts on it. I called this segment “Daily Ruminations.” Needless to say, no one cared. So, I’m rebooting the idea. Here it goes.

I’m not into all the celebrity gossip, nor am I a newshound. I’d like to think of myself as a free-thinker capable of open-mindedness who’s willing to be wrong every now and then. I’d like to think I have a sense of humor. And obviously, because of those things, I think you (you fine bunch of eyeballs, you) should listen. I may be wrong. It wouldn’t be the first time. I will try to keep my views short and sweet. Since this is a trial run, I need your comments. Tell me what you like and what you don’t like, blah blah blah… and away we go!

1. Swedish sales clerk refuses to sell Oprah Winfrey a hand bag because he doesn’t believe she can afford it.

The flames on the torches outside of Paula Deen’s house are slowly dying away, so it’s time, once again, to remind everyone that racism is a thing. You’ve probably already heard about Oprah’s run-in with the Rush Limbaugh of purses, but what you might not have heard is that Switzerland (yes, the entire bleeding republic), has apologized for this guy. Think about that for a minute. This dude wasn’t a consulate. He wasn’t a damn dignitary. I don’t believe he was flying the Swiss flag and swimming in a pool of the world’s finest chocolate while insulting our beloved Harpo. But Switzerland still felt the need to apologize for him. Imagine if America did that; apologized for every nitwit who opened his mouth in this country. Johannes Rydberg couldn’t calculate those numbers, bub.

2. 15 ton mass of fat, wipes, and sanitary napkins found in London’s sewers.

London, you be nasty, yo. But, in all seriousness, why were people shocked at this? We have a land mass the size of Texas, which is made up of mostly plastics and other unwanted detritus, just floating around out there in the ocean, but people are making a big deal over an impacted sewage tunnel. Give me a break. I mean, the fact “Fatberg” (no joke, hand over heart, that’s what they’re calling it) is basically Tampax and lard is a wee bit unsettling, but not unexpected. People like convenience.  Ladies, I know how busy you are these days. I understand one of the female sex cannot be bothered to toss their lady products into a waste basket, that it’s much easier to flush them, especially for you busy London gals. I also know that some people can’t be bothered with draining the fat off their cooked meats into a disposable container. Just wash it down the drain with a little hot water; that’ll do the trick. I mean, if you did put it in something like a plastic bottle or whatnot, it would just end up in the ocean, right?

Daily Tip: An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain. Don’t be an ostrich. 

E.

(Note:  This blog is not professionally edited. You get it exactly how it comes out of my head.)