A Confession

So, I guess I may as well come clean. I have a Deep Dark Secret, which I am about to reveal, a Secret that goes to the very Core of My Being and is inextricably entangled with my Caps Lock button. I, DD Barant . . . am pseudonymous.
It's sort of like being anonymous, but with worse spelling. What it means is that I, technically, am not a real person. I'm a pseudonym, from the Latin "pseudo", meaning "made-up" and "nym", meaning either an old animated movie about imprisoned mice or...